If you can’t get laid, read this

This post is for those who really can’t get laid. I’m talking about this:

I know dozens of guys like me. Late 20′s, next to no sexual experience.

I think first of all you have to sit down and answer the question of why you can’t get laid. If you come up with an answer like looks, money or culture, you’re wrong. Guys with worse looks and less money than you get laid all the time in every part of the world. If you think long enough about it you can’t avoid reaching a conclusion which is simple and logical but hard to accept: the problem which prevents you from getting laid is in your head. It’s not clothes or wallets; it’s something you think or say or do.

The hardest thing for many of us is letting go of our beliefs. I know because I’ve been trapped in this situation for quite some time in my younger days. I didn’t seem to have much success with girls but I always thought I was doing things the right way – only the world was somehow “wrong”. It was the “girls’ fault”. Looking back it’s clear to me that I was a stereotypical nice guy thoroughly indoctrinated by all the nonsense I was bombarded with regarding women and dating. And the biggest problem was not that I did stupid things, but that I was absolutely sure that I was doing what I was supposed to do. And I was confused as hell when things didn’t work out. I was a kind of a white knight who pedestalized girls because “that was the decent thing to do”. I imagined myself to be a prince on a white horse who’ll endure any pain for his princess. I thought I’d show my strength by taking and withstanding any shit thrown my way and sadly I failed to realize that girls were looking for guys who showed their strength by not taking any shit at all.

So, what I mean is probably the biggest hurdle you’ll ever face regarding dating is admitting that the problem is in your own head. It might be the way you view women, or the way you view yourself. Maybe you’re not bold enough. Probably you suffer from oneitis. All the things which you must overcome to get laid are in your head and you’re the one who’s not willing to let go of these ideas. Stop blaming the world and fighting against it, it won’t do you any good. You’re not the tragic hero of the show turning into a “martyr for love”, you’re just an everyday fellow whose head has been filled with lies. Admit it and get over it. The sooner the better.

A few examples of these lies which make men think they’re morally superior to others but in fact only make them fail at getting laid:

The most obvious ones are of course the ones that say you should treat girls nicely. You should carry their bags at school or buy them drinks in bars. Always be polite and do what-the-fuck-ever she wants you to do. Try to read her mind and always do everything you can to please her. Hollywood and feminism indoctrinates you with this sh*t and it’s so deeply engraved in your mind that you really and truly can’t understand how could it be that thugs screw the best women while you get LJBFs.

You might often hear that if you want to get good with women you’ll have to have practice. But since you’ve been indoctrinated by hollywood and feminism, you find this idea repulsive. You think that you only supposed to try to get into the pants hearts of girls you’re in love with.

A touchier issue is using escorts. It is very basic knowledge in PU (PickUp) circles that neediness kills a girl’s attraction towards you. You could “cure” neediness by using escorts but that’s unimaginable for you because… you’ve been indoctrinated by hollywood and feminism and find this idea repulsive. (As a side note I’d say that if you’re over 20 and still a virgin you should immediately pick up the phone and call an escort.)

Somewhere along the way you’ll have to recognise that imaginary moral high grounds and success with women doesn’t mix and you’ll have to choose between them. I believe by now the choice is easy, but hey, if you still want the moral high ground by all means indulge yourself – it means more women are left for me.

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68 Responses to If you can’t get laid, read this

  1. ThinkingMan says:

    Good post.

    Don’t forget that religious feminism has brainwashed an entire generation of sexually frustrated white knights who get blown off by church girls who like riding bad boy cock or even if they don’t, do not consider their male counterparts as desirable compared with players and non-church men. Want to find pussified girly-men manginas? No better place to find them than in church.

    I’m not advocating immorality, that’s not my intended point. No, my point is that if a guy wants to learn of manhood and attracting the opposite sex, most churches don’t have a clue and actually are a breeding ground for sexually frustrated men who view life through an idealistic prism not shared by so many of their female church member counterparts.

    That’s what happens when you get your manhood ideals from girly-men henpecked pastors/hubbies or worse yet, unsatisfied married women who play the part of the happy wife but are anything but that in their homes.

  2. sestamibi says:

    I fully concur and then some. I only wish I had known these things back when it made a difference to me (I’ll be 60 soon).

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  5. Gorbachev says:

    Churches are bad news for breeding men that can, well, breed.

    Always have been.

    Men have to learn everything they need to know outside the church.

  6. Frankie says:

    True that. The bitches want the bad boy cock, nice guys finish LAST…I should know, cuz I finished dead last. But, I do get the last laugh… cuz now I actually have money, since I didn’t have to spend it all on BITCHES. Thank you.

  7. Davey says:

    I was told once that I am the nicest guy left on the planet. So, of course, I can’t get laid. I treat women with respect; I have a great sense of humor; I’m easy to get along with and easy to please. So, of course, I can’t get laid.
    But, if I was an asshole who cared only about myself, force myself on women, treat them like crap, or was dumb as an ox, then, OBVIOUSLY I would get laid.

  8. Yeah, it’s the same deal as golf…my head starts thinking and fucks up my game. Anyway, I’m with Frankie…I definitely have more $$ than I would if I was getting laid.

  9. Quantumleap says:

    I’m one of those ‘bad boys’ mentioned here and I can tell you firsthand I’ve got all my money too.

    Just another symptom of the mistaken mindset of the ‘nice guy’. Who spends their cash on ‘bitches’?!!! After we’ve had sex I’m willing to go 50/50 with the occasional gesture of paying for everything or a gift because the ‘bitch’ has earned it. You want to get laid? Make her pay for her own shit or at the very least make sure you’re getting something in return. ie reverse kino, her undivided attention, a kiss etc which is building towards a lay.

    Nice guys think paying for things on a ‘date’ is ‘nice’ and going to make the girl like you more. It DOESN’T fellas!! Get that through your thick nice guy heads. Women want men who challenge them. Who make them earn the man’s approval and validation. It’s not the other way around boys.

    Learn game and learn how to make those vaginas tingle. Not dry up like a box crusty old raisins left out in the sun too long. Because that’s exactly what lame ass nice guy behavior accomplishes and only that.

  10. Alex001 says:

    Nice guys finish last, or not at all. I am past the point of trying to work on my “game” to get laid.

    Nothing i do or say makes any difference. I am 26, aesthetically attractive, well-spoken, funny and outgoing. Too bad im also a nice guy who gets shit on by everyone in the world.

    FUCK YOU, FUCK WOMEN, FUCK THE WHOLE STUPID HUMAN RACE.

  11. Nick says:

    Alex001 – You sound just like me brother. You know what man, in all honesty, the whole dam world is superficial and dumb as fuck, and anyone who tells me differently should get their head knocked off! The best advice I can give you (which I’ve just very recently taken upon myself) is to just LET GO! Stop trying, stop giving a fuck —- just FUCK IT!!! The way I see it, let the chips fall where they may, and who knows, maybe something great will come along, something better than you ever expected. Be a good person, do the right things, not because you’re supposed to, but because it comes from your heart. Be genuine and ultimately just be you. That right there is the definition of LIVING WELL!!!

  12. Robert says:

    This is largely BS. The fact that you said you should pay for sex if you’re a virgin over 20 is the first sign of that. I’ve had plenty of girls come onto me and I’m a nice guy. This whole “nice guys finish last” stuff is BS. Being a nice guy who treats females with respect isn’t synonymous with being a pushover who lets girls walk all over him. The difference between a pushover and an attractive man boils down to one thing. Self respect. I open doors for girls, I do them favors like I would anyone else, I talk to them about their lives like I would with anyone else, and yes, they call me a sweet nice guy, but at the same time they come onto me. Do you know why? Because I know where to draw the line. Guy or girl, if they’re giving me crap I don’t put up with it. Women are attracted to men they respect and are in control of their situation. The reason women aren’t attracted to pushover “nice guys” is because they don’t respect themselves, they aren’t assertive, their persona lacks any real power and they’re just plain boring. Doesn’t mean you have to be a punk and act like a jerk. Plus if you’re willing to alter your personality and be a jerk to get laid you are truly a pathetic person who has no self worth. Focus on becoming the man you want to be and accomplishing what you’re passionate about and women will be attracted to you.

  13. Deansdale says:

    Oh sure, it is so simple – yet somehow millions have serious problems with dating. But worry no more, captain Robert is here and he solves all your problems by saying ‘just be confident’. Cool.
    Also please show me where I said you should “be a punk and act like a jerk”. Until then, fock off.

  14. Alex001 says:

    I am angry and frustrated about my lack of a sexlife, but i also recognize its my own fault.

    I have no self-respect, self-esteem or feeling of being worhtwhile at all. My anger at the world is only a symptom of my own inability to realize my full potential.

    No amount of “manning-up” ever works… you come across as insincere, which is almost as bad as being desperate.

    I am a uselss human being.

  15. Deansdale says:

    Try to relax. You know you’re not useless, you are just frustrated.

  16. half ass says:

    dude i hate women now its bad

  17. Alex001 says:

    I dont hate women, i just hate myself. I am a piece of shit with nothing positive to offer a woman, thats why ill always be alone.

    I feel completely emasculated by my own inability to be a real man. Its a never-ending cycle of bullshit. I am a desperate pussy, and its my own fault. Fuck my life.

  18. anton says:

    alex001 i feel with you. I am in the same situation and frustrated as hell. Well, we have no choice than learning to respect ourselves and getting our self-esteem back. Dont let your hope down, although I am frustrated and didnt had sex for 3 years, it can only get better. Lets see it as a chance for us to grow more into the person we have to be. Its a hard world we live in and people can be mean, ecspecially if you are shy, different than most people. We have to adapt, we have no other choice man, if we dont change we will end up alone. See it as an opportunity to change, I try to see it that way. Good luck to you man.

  19. circlebill says:

    As I see it, the real problem for nice guys lies in the element of CARING! All genuine nice guys CARE a very great deal about women and and their feelings! Every nice guy really does try to be like a legendary knight in shining armor! Unfortunately, most women lack the maturity and understanding to appreciate the righteous devotion being lavished on them! When a very CARING nice guy caters to a woman as though she were a legendary Queen-Goddess, the woman only sees a weak man who must be a pushover! That’s the result of so much CARING!

    On the other hand, if the nice guy gives up the element of CARING and instead treats a woman like she was yesterday’s garbage, he will suddenly be seen by her as strong and manly! And so the answer is for nice guys to stop all this unappreciated high devotion and CARING! Women like this need to be treated as easily replaced disposables of little value! They need to know that they’ll be thrown aside at the drop of a hat!

    Without the element of CARING, a man can approach a hundred women and more without fearing the pain of rejection! If he finds just five willing women out of each hundred approaches, he’s well on his way to becoming a player with lots of girlfriends! By sifting through hundreds of women, he’ll polish his approach and improve his numbers and quickly discard women that he’s tired of! Of course the man won’t be a nice guy any more! He may not even be a decent human being any more! He may never actually love or CARE again! But that’s the kind of man most women choose and deserve!

  20. Deansdale says:

    I don’t quite agree but everybody is entitled to their own opinions :)

  21. Alex001 says:

    Still useless…. and you’re right. I really shouldnt CARE anymore. Im at the point where ive stopped approaching women alltogether. I think ive pretty much just resigned myself to the fact that im gonna be alone, and so id rather just enjoy my day.
    I have no use for women other than to fuck them, and they dont seem to be interested in that. Now I just stay away, and i dont even respond when a girl talks or smiles at me. Fuck women, im done.
    From now on its boxing, camping and smoking weed on the agenda.
    Oh yea, and rubbing one out every morning.

  22. Zak582 says:

    i’m fucked up. i can say fuck my life wit a smile on my face. i been a nice guy for MOST of my life. i’m 19, not a virgin but still feel like one(cuz i got set up wit an ugly girl at 18, pressured into it, n she got more pleasure than i did. wtf?), may hav personality disorders cuz of my unwanted celibacy in high school, may be emo to, maybe masochistic. wow i bitch alot lol no wonder i can’t get laid by a beautiful girl(even though there may be more reasons why i can’t get laid but like hell people would wanna hear me talk. i’m depressed again. FUCK! i may jus need someone i can talk to bout this shit though. guess this is my only source)

  23. Deansdale says:

    Well, I’m glad you had a place to vent :) I know this does not really help but you’re way too young to draw serious conclusions. Most guys (80%+) your age have problems like you. If you persist, and are willing to work, things will get better.

  24. Regret says:

    try to funnel these bad emotions into something that will help you get girls. When you feel like shit try to go work out. Get muscular and in shape. Hopefully girls will hit on you and you dont even have to know how to “woo” women. If thats too hard to do and you still really want to get women but are to pussy to work for it, you can get ur nuts surgically removed so you can stop desiring them and live a life thats not full of pain which is pointless to live!

  25. Anyone can get laid says:

    It either takes coke or money to get pussy at the drop of a hat. Anything else you should be looking for is ideally a person with a great personality/intelligence/looks depending on respective ages. Leave the strictly blue-balls business as a transaction— that’s my motto.

  26. Bad Nice Guy says:

    Here’s what worked for me as an eighteen-year-old nice guy with a friend who was lovely, engaged, and a little older. Isolate, then instigate. Show courage and admit that you’re scared, tell her that you like her and that she’s lovely, then ask her. Chicks like courage even more than confidence, but you have to let them know that you’re scared as hell to ask them. Don’t ask at a bar or in any group setting. It has to be done privately. I had to do two isolates to get to a really private place. I told her I wanted to talk to her and needed to ask her in private. First time she walked with me to a corner of the college restaurant. I explained that it wasn’t private enough and she took me to her dorm room. I’m sure she suspected what I was going to ask and she didn’t make it too easy to ask her–she teased me at first instead of answering directly, then reminded me that she was engaged. There were a couple of awkward pauses as I struggled to get the words out. We did it for a week.

    I was never a cocky asshole this whole time. I never felt any real confidence.

    I only ever tried this approach once and never again; I found out that I pair-bonded quickly and intensely. The break up was very hard on me. If you suspect that you pair-bond quickly and intensely, you might not want to do this.

    This approach could work in asking a desirable woman for a date, but probably only if you get to know her first and become friends. Isolating and instigating show leadership. Obviously, the instigation is for a date.

  27. Jaded says:

    Number 1
    Has anyone noticed that during their younger days, the bad boys do all their usual asshole/jerk stuff, and they get girl after girl and have sex with all the women they can. Then when they finally get married and are 40+ and have kids, most (not all) of them turn into nice guys preaching all this being kind towards others, respecting and helping everyone bullshit. It is like, after they have had all the fun they wanted to (during their bad boy years), they have now retired and turned into these hypocrite saints telling everyone that it is wrong to be a bad boy and that being a nice guy is the only way to heaven. It seems more like they are ashamed of their own doings during their bad boy days, and now they are just trying to pay for their crimes by doing community service through their ironic preaching about kindness, respect and being helpful to others garbage.

    Number 2
    The other thing that I’ve noticed is that, a lot of people (or the smartypants wise guys) seem to think that if you are some 30 (or 40) year old hopeless loser virgin who sits at home 24/7 365 days a year with a boner because you can’t get a girl for yourself, then the solution is to turn into a Bad Boy and be a jerk to girls, and then you’ll magically get laid and lose your virginity. What I’m saying is that, these wise asses think that if you stop being a nice guy who respects girls, and turn into a Bad Boy and stop respecting girls, then you’ll automatically get laid.

    What these guys don’t realize is that there are a lot of factors at play when you are trying to attract a girl. And a major factor about the guy attracting the girl is: (a) looks, and (b) personality/characteristics/attitude. So let’s say there is a guy who is good looking, cute or hot. So he will already have the attention of girls towards him because of his looks. But that just means that the girl is 50% attracted to him. Now let’s say the guy has a bad attitude, is a jerk/player/cheater and has the personality about not giving a sh!t about what others (mostly girls) think about him. Then this is the other remaining 50% of the attractiveness the girl has towards him, because she sees him as a brave guy/hero/leader or the dominating/superior male due to him not being a sissy crybaby who worries too much about what others think of him and always trying to please everyone. So this guy already has the looks. This gets the attraction of the girl (or her heart) towards the guy from starting at 0 and then increasing to 50%. And then the guy also has the right attitude, that is the Bad Boy. So this gets the remaining attraction of the girl (or her p(_)ssy) towards the guy. Why? Because the guy is a turn on for the girl and he is a good provider for her children who will also have stronger genes from the father. So since she is already attracted towards him 50% due to his looks, another 50% of her attractiveness is added to that because he has the right attitude (Bad Boy) that she is looking for. So this causes her to be attracted to the guy, 100%. And so, the guy can just sit back and relax, while the girl approaches him, spreads her legs, sits on him and starts bouncing on his you-know-what.

    Now what I’ll say next is the important part that makes things clear, removes our confusion and answers the question, why most of us nice guys have to use our hands to sympathies with our depressed boners everyday, even if we may be good looking. So like I described in the previous paragraph about the (a) looks and (b) personality/characteristics/attitude, the same applies here. Let’s say there is a guy who is good looking, cute or hot. So he will already have the attention of girls towards him because of his looks. But that just means that the girl is 50% attracted to him. Now let’s say the guy is a nice guy, tries to make everyone happy (including the girl), is always available for the girl, does whatever she says, always does what is morally right, is an honest guy who always speaks the truth, thinks and puts the needs of the society first even if it is at his expense, and always thinks about what the girl thinks about him if he does this or that. And so this is the other remaining 50% of the attractiveness the girl could have had towards him, but she doesn’t.

    Why? Because she sees him as a weak guy/cowardly/follower or the submissive/inferior male, due to him being a sissy crybaby pushover who worries too much about what others think of him, and is always trying to please everyone instead of doing things for his own self and his future wife (the girl) and her children. So, this guy already has the looks. This gets the attraction of the girl (or her heart) towards the guy from starting at 0 and then increasing to 50%. But then the guy has the wrong attitude, that is the Nice Guy. So this makes the remaining attraction of the girl (or her p(_)ssy) towards the guy, to actually not be attracted. Why? Because the guy is a turn-off and a bad provider for her children who will also have weaker genes from the father. So since she is attracted towards him 50% due to his looks, the other 50% of her attractiveness is not added to that because he has the wrong attitude (Nice Guy), that she isn’t looking for. So this causes her to be attracted to the guy only 50% out of 100. What this means is that girls are attracted to the nice guy, but only to the good looking nice guys. So it is a 50-50 thing. A few girls will be willing to sleep with the good looking nice guys (where the guy loses his virginity), while the other average or below average looking nice guys can just sit back and relax, while the girl comes towards him, and then as she gets closer, she walks straight past him and then goes to the bad boy that I described 2 paragraphs ago, spreads her legs, sits on him and starts bouncing on his you-know-what, while the boner of the nice guy turns around, looks at the nice guy and says: “Dude, WTF?!!!” And then the boner turns to where it faced before, slants a bit downwards and starts crying, while the nice guy puts a hand on its head and says while comforting it: “There, there” And lies: “Don’t feel bad. You’ll get your turn someday”

    Number 3
    Now for the Mr. Know It Alls. You guys think that just because you succeeded in getting laid even though you’re a Nice Guy, so you are the ones doing everything right while the other Nice Guys did everything wrong? So you guys are the ones full of confidence while the other Nice Guys lack confidence? Guess what, Nerds? You guys weren’t doing anything right at all (perhaps a few of you did). Neither were you truly confident enough. So how did you guys lose your virginity? I’ll tell you how. You guys, simply got LUCKY. You Mr. Know It All nerds, lost your virginity, by FLUKE. You lost your virginity by chance simply because everything went your way. The reality is that most of you Mr. Know It All Nice Guys were good looking, but lacked the Bad Boy attitude. So you were sitting on the 50-50 fence that I described in the above paragraph, and then a few girls who ignored your lack of bad boy attitude and focused totally on your cuteness and overruled their p(_)ssies (that lusted for bad boys) with the combined effort from their minds and hearts, had sex with you. So that’s how you got lucky and lost your virginity during the one night stand or even if the relationship lasted, then it wasn’t for long. So you Mr. Know It Alls don’t really have what it takes to get laid and lose your virginity. You guys just got lucky. So please don’t accuse the other Nice Guys of this or that, or whatever you Mr. Know It Alls will think about and blame.

  28. Deansdale says:

    You are jaded, I can attest to that…

    Not everything is up to luck. You can experience the different outcomes when you try different approaches.

  29. As regards the practices of Christians seeking marriage, here are some thoughts about possibly appropriate sexualization:

    I’ve taught my adult daughter that it’s Ok to sexualize and also to dial back the sexualization, depending on the necessity. A single, chaste woman who is seeking marriage needs to indicate that she is a sexual being and also that she wants to maintain her chastity. It’s Ok for her to say, “If we were married I’d be all over you.” It’s also Ok for her to say, “Sorry, that will have to wait for marriage.” She might also say, “If you’re so interested in my body, why haven’t you proposed marriage yet?”

    Of course, Christian men also need to sexualize conversations to some degree when they are looking for marriage. They don’t need to mouth, “You’re so hot!” like a beta, but they can use some appropriate, low-key negs to sexualize the conversation. Christian men need to learn to engage women on a sexual level in conversation while remaining chaste and also to learn how to take sexuality in conversation more lightly and playfully. Christian men need to learn how to get women used to their touch while courting, keeping everything appropriate.

  30. Oh, yeah, I’m an old married fart and I find that women come on to me all the time. (Yeah, my wedding ring makes my finger swell cuz it’s 1/2 size too small so I don’t wear it.) I’m average height, am overweight (not obese, though), and quite bald. I’m not aware of doing any sexualization myself, but just my confidence and lack of interest in women seems to build attraction. And I simply smile. So, I’m not needy and I’m aloof and confident. I bathe regularly, lol, and groom myself and don’t wear raggedy clothing. Simple stuff. I’m actually pretty nice, so nice guys _can_ generate interest. I get my self in social situations, especially dancing, and the action starts. I take dance lessons and attend weekly/monthly dance parties at dance studios or bars which have a dance floor. If I were single, I’d sexualize conversations with eligible women. It really isn’t that hard to be a nice guy and attract women. At my age, I attract women despite not being overwhelmingly physically attractive and having some facial blemishes due to skin aging. I don’t compliment women on their looks, but I may notice changes or notice things that aren’t changes (which women seem to still find attractive). Recently, a couple of women who were attracted to me are 7’s and I often attract 6’s _all without trying_! I’m near 60 and the women are usually quite a bit younger than I am (say, in their 40’s). Not sure if my situation applies to younger guys, though.

    Play a bit with women conversationally, generate some comfort, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. Make sure that they generate comfort in you and aren’t crazy chicks. Start out just trying to engage women in playful conversation and don’t worry about getting laid.

  31. Jaded says:

    Number 4 (Part 2 of Number 2)
    Have you ever were a Nice Guy who wasn’t good looking either and remained a virgin for decades and then though that if you suddenly turned into a Bad Boy, you’ll lose your virginity and become a man? Well, that’s what all of us Nice Guys think. But the truth is that it works for mostly the good looking nice guys. For the physically unattractive nice guys, this hardly works. As I explained in my previous paragraphs that girls are attracted to a guy based on his looks when she sees him for the first time. This is because that’s the only information that she has about him during that time. What drives her to have sex with the guy is his bad boy appeal.

    Now imagine if a nice guy who wasn’t good looking, turned into a bad boy and became a jerk to girls. Do you think he’ll succeed in losing his virginity? Very few of them will. Why? Let’s say there is a guy who is not good looking, cute or hot. So he will not have the attention of girls towards him because of his looks. That means that the girl is 0% attracted to him. So it means that she doesn’t find him physically attractive. In another way, she sees him as an ugly, unattractive guy who will be an embarrassment to her if she ever got into a relationship or if she was ever seen with him by her friends. And also, he will give her ugly children if they ever had any. So there is no appeal at all from the guy due to him being physically unattractive and also her being shallow.

    So the attractiveness from the girl doesn’t exist towards the nice guy and remains at 0%. And then this is where the nice guys make the mistake of thinking that becoming a bad boy and being a jerk to the girl will get her for him and he’ll finally lose his virginity. So since the nice guy senses a lack of attention and attraction from the girl, he starts being a jerk to her. The problem is, since the initial physical appeal isn’t there from you, then being a jerk to the girl actually works backwards and against you. Because originally the girl was only not attracted to you. But now she hates you. Instead of being a jerk that will manipulate her into being mentally attracted to your bad boy attitude, you have made her angry by your unwelcome jerky ways. If a guy has looks, then it catches the initial attention of the girl (her heart). And then his bad boy attitude attracts the remaining attention from her (her p(_)ssy). But if the guy doesn’t have the looks, then there is no attention gained from the girl (her heart). And then being a bad boy won’t do anything to attract the remaining attention (her p(_)ssy). Instead of making her p(_)ssy wet, it will continue to remain dry.

    When a hot guy (even if he is a nice guy) gets the attention of a girl, then she becomes his slave. And then if he also happens to be a bad boy and is a jerk to her, she will simply accept what he does or how badly her treats and hurts her. But if there is a guy (including a nice guy) who isn’t good looking, then he doesn’t have the attention of the girl at all. She doesn’t become his slave. She isn’t under his power. And then if the guy happens to be a bad boy and is a jerk to her, she won’t accept it and will hate whatever he does to her or how badly he treats or hurts her. She will think of him instead as a weirdo who will make an embarrassing husband to her if she becomes his future wife (the girl) and give her ugly and weird children like him. Her attraction towards the physically unattractive nice guy remains at 0% or even becomes – 100%.

  32. Jaded, we know from empirical evidence that there are unattractive PUAs who are notching large numbers. Your argument is hogwash.

  33. Jaded says:

    @ The Autistic Gamer
    And so, you’ve proven that you’re one of those Mr. Know It Alls. Next you’ll tell me that I’m doing everything wrong.

    The PUAs are guys who are simply getting lucky. They aren’t the ones who truly know the game. Do these PUAs ever reveal about the large number of girls that rejected them? They only talk about their success.

  34. Deansdale says:

    Jaded, no matter how hard you try you can’t invalidate the personal experiences of thousands of people just because you hate us for indiscernible reasons. I myself was a beta once, and I still am to a degree. Looking back to my younger days I now realize what I did wrong in my relationships, and I understand why some girls dumped me back then. I also happen to live in an LTR now so I have the opportunity to test out any damn theory I read, hear or dream up. So I do. And I happen to know for a fact that attraction is not random. How I behave affects how attractive I am. It’s a simple concept a kindergartener might understand with a little luck, I can’t fathom why some grownup guys refuse to wrap their heads around it.

    And I don’t want to seem rude but it’s my blog and I don’t like when people leave their trash around, so please leave constructive, well-thought-out comments from now on or expect some moderation. Endlessly regurgitating omegavirginrevolt’s bullshit excuse of an argument is unnacceptable in these civilized circles.

  35. Jaded says:

    @ Deansdale

    If you think that’s what I’m doing, then go ahead with the moderation. Remove all of my comments, even. I won’t be losing anything from it. There will be others like me coming here in the future.

    But the question is, if you guys are coming up with ways that are working out, then how much have you helped nice guys/nerds/virgins with your little tricks?

    And where did I say anything about hating you? This is just one of those assumptions that you and your buddies have fooled yourselves into thinking about me here and then you think that I am somehow trying to be against you all.

    The problem with people like you is that just because you see and hear a few people succeeding with their tricks and their experiences, you think those are the right ways of succeeding. And then you call it evidence. The reason why I don’t agree with such evidence is because I have seen that there are guys who tried those tricks and then it didn’t work out for them. It even puts them in a worse state than they originally were. Just because those tricks work for a few guys, doesn’t mean it is the right way for a guy to get a girl. Because there are guys who are told to use those tricks, yet they still get rejected. The other thing you need to realize is that, nice guys aren’t the only ones at fault. Girls are at fault too.

    How you behave affects how attractive you are? Too bad it only makes bad boys even more attractive to girls.

    Now since you have read whatever bullshit I have written and reached the end of it, and that it is unacceptable in your little civilized circle, you can go ahead and moderate it. Or even better, remove my comments and block me if you have the option to. After all, why do you continue to keep my comments if they are trash, nonconstructive and not well-thought-out? I’m expecting not some, but full moderation. Let’s say, if you do have the choice of blocking me, and I do get blocked, your boys can then consider me as a troll – simply because I didn’t agree with your personal experiences and chose to speak out for those nice guys who are in the minority and have nothing working in their favor. But in the end, I’m only saying what you said to ‘captain Robert’ a few comments above. So yes, my comments are trash, nonconstructive and not well-thought-out (if it makes you happy), go ahead with the moderation and do remove all of my comments, block me if you have the option to, and then consider me a troll who doesn’t contribute anything good.

  36. @Jaded
    “The PUAs are guys who are simply getting lucky.”

    Consistently lucky. Brilliant, simply brilliant.

  37. Deansdale says:

    This blog is my way of helping other guys, but for it to work those guys have to
    1. realize they need help
    2. have an open mind and a willingness to learn
    3. make an actual, honest attempt at trying what I suggest
    Without these there is nothing I (or anyone else) can do to help them. Of course they could figure it out on their own, but if that would work that easily there would be no need for any dating advice whatsoever.

    Look, if you talk about us like “you and your buddies have fooled yourselves into [...]” it’s perfectly clear you don’t like us. No problem, not everybody has to like me, but it’s more classy to be honest about it, and don’t try to pretend that this personal unsympathy does not color your perception of game. You are not objective, you are emotional.

    And the biggest problem: you know fuck about game. Nothing. You keep talking about “‘tricks”. Had you read anything I’ve written you’d know already that I do not advocate “tricks”. What you are so angry against is not game but the haters’ misconceptions and intentional mischaracterisations of it. You don’t understand what we do, how we got here, why we say the things we say. And this is perfectly understandable since you never listen. You just talk, talk and talk without listening to us for a single moment. This makes it really hard to argue against us coherently – that’s why you fail at it. If you think game does not work, fine, but at the very least please try to find out what game is before you condemn it. You are like a funny little guy visiting oil painting forums saying painting oil is silly since it all goes to refineries to be turned into gas anyways.

  38. Jaded says:

    @ Deansdale

    If you truly think that I don’t like you because I’m saying that you are fooling yourself into thinking that I hate you, then it isn’t me who doesn’t like you. It actually is you who thinks that. You’re saying that when I say you’re fooling yourself into believing that I don’t like you, is a sign that I don’t like you, then you have to realize that I said all that after you said that I hate you. And still I don’t hate any of you. You still haven’t provided proof about exactly what I said that states that I hate you.

    The only people I hate are those who accuse nice guys of lacking confidence and then blaming them for their failures. These are people who ignore the fact that girls are shallow. And they also ignore the fact that girls say that they want a nice and caring guy, but they can’t see one when he is right in front of her, and then they go for the bad boys and claim that there are no nice guys. So you’re saying that I haven’t read what what you wrote? But you’re doing the same thing. If you had read ‘Number 3′, you would have clearly known who I hate. I’ll say it again. I hate those who think that all it takes is confidence and a bit of tricks, to get girls. And they accuse nice guys of not having confidence and doing the tricks wrong. Those are the people I hate.

    ‘I think first of all you have to sit down and answer the question of why you can’t get laid. If you come up with an answer like looks, money or culture, you’re wrong. Guys with worse looks and less money than you get laid all the time in every part of the world.’

    ‘If you think long enough about it you can’t avoid reaching a conclusion which is simple and logical but hard to accept: the problem which prevents you from getting laid is in your head.’

    ‘I didn’t seem to have much success with girls but I always thought I was doing things the right way – only the world was somehow “wrong”. It was the “girls’ fault”.’

    ‘You don’t understand what we do, how we got here, why we say the things we say. And this is perfectly understandable since you never listen. You just talk, talk and talk without listening to us for a single moment.’

    Alright, if what you say brings success to nice guys and virgins, then how come there are guys out there who are doing everything that you’re saying, yet they still can’t get laid? They can’t all be doing things wrong. I’ve seen guys who are bad looking, lack money and of different culture. And they didn’t care about any of that. They didn’t let that be a barrier. But they still got rejected and couldn’t get laid. I’ve been thinking for a long time about them. I thought to myself that if these guys were told that it was all in their head, and if they stopped thinking that they were not getting laid because they weren’t good looking, then how come they are still getting rejected? And then I realized that they weren’t the ones at fault. The world is at fault. The girls are at fault too. What you are doing is telling the guys that they are the only ones at fault. And that is what I don’t agree to. Are you saying that girls aren’t attracted to jocks but think that all nerdy guys are attractive in high school? Are you saying that an ugly virgin guy who doesn’t care about his looks, approaches a girl and gets told by her that she doesn’t feel the same way towards him, but then somehow in the next minute she has major feelings for a hot guy who she is willing to have sex with – that none of that is true and it doesn’t exist? That is exactly what I am trying to point out.

    ‘You are like a funny little guy visiting oil painting forums saying painting oil is silly since it all goes to refineries to be turned into gas anyways.’

    And you’re like the guy who tells skinny guys to do this and that type of exercise and their bodies will be packed with muscles in 5 years. When the guys do all those exercises and come back looking hardly changed after 5 years and tell you that it didn’t work, you tell them that it is all in their head that they think they don’t have muscles. And if they truly don’t have muscles, then it is all their fault. You totally ignore the fact the the skinny guys have the ectomorphic body type that doesn’t allow it to become muscular with the usual tricks.

  39. @Jaded
    We see plenty of examples of guys who aren’t particularly good looking getting laid regularly. Ugly guys will always have problems, but not those who are 5+ if they develop conversational skills and some confidence and the proper aloof attitude and some game skills.

    I was good looking as a youth and didn’t have much trouble finding girls to make out with/pet, but I wasn’t into ONS. I also lacked confidence, but I forced myself to approach girls. I had a serious conversational skill deficit, but that didn’t stop me, probably because of my looks and the fact that I paid attention to establishing girls’ comfort with escalation.

    Participation in Couples’ Dancing (like Ballroom or West Coast Swing) will do wonders for confidence and leadership. Guys will need to take group lessons in ballroom dancing. Then, when they have a little skill, they will find that they can approach girls and get them to say “yes” to dancing with the guy. It will massively boost their confidence and minimize their fear of rejection. They will get used to girls saying “yes.”

    Guys will have to learn how to lead and dominate the girl on the dance floor by leading her in the dance. Guys will get used to touching girls and being comfortable touching them. Guys will have opportunities to practice conversation while dancing with girls. Dancing is great exercise and can help guys eliminate excess weight. It’s also more enjoyable than solo exercise for many people. So, ballroom dancing is a very useful “trick” for nice guys.

  40. FinishFirst says:

    Guys you got it all wrong, you can keep beating yourself up for being “a nice guy” or you could just learn that women want a man. You keep saying that “bad boys” or “assholes” get laid and get all the women, but why is that? First it’s because they don’t let women run all over them or bow down to them. women don’t find that attractive. Think of the law of the jungle, a woman is turned on by a man that challenges her, that makes her feel a sense of intrigue. If you guys would just say….Fuck it…I’m done with the nice guy routine, I’m not gonna kiss up to all these women, I’m gonna make the woman be challenged by me, you’d get more chicks. I’m not implying that you have to become a bad boy or asshole but you gotta start being more of a man. Women are not turned on by something similar to how they act, they need to see a man. Or maybe you would like to “just be friends”. Up to you. I’ll be more than just friends and not kiss up to women.

  41. Jaded says:

    @ FinishFirst
    That only works for hot nice guys. The ugly nice guys will have very little achievement if they do or do not let women run all over them. Most women would just walk away if ugly nice guys don’t bow down to them.

    If you are in a desert with nothing around, and then after a while you find a plant with a flower, then it becomes something that you want. The flower is a beautiful object that caught your ‘attention’ and you want it. But if that flower has a fence around it and you can’t approach the plant and get that flower, then it becomes a ‘challenge’. You will make attempts to overcome the barrier (fence) and get the flower.

    Now if you are in the same desert but instead of finding a plant with a flower, you find a shrub with just normal looking leaves that has been fenced. Then it really isn’t something that you want. The shrub isn’t an object that really caught your ‘attention’. Whether there is a fence around the shrub or not, it really isn’t a ‘challenge’ because you aren’t going to approach the shrub. You will make no to very little attempts to overcome the barrier (fence) and get to the shrub.

    So that’s the same with women. If a hot looking nice guy doesn’t let a woman run all over him, then he gets her ‘attention’. Since the guy is hot, he is the beautiful object that caught her ‘attention’. And if she cannot get that beautiful object (hot looking nice guy), then she will make attempts to overcome that ‘challenge’ (barrier) and get him. Why? Because if she doesn’t make attempts in getting him, then she is losing the treasure, which is the beautiful object that caught her ‘attention’.

    Now if the guy turns out to be an ugly looking nice guy, then it really doesn’t matter whether he lets the woman run all over him or not. This is because he doesn’t have her ‘attention’ in the first place. Since the guy is ugly, he isn’t the object that has caught her ‘attention’. So if the ugly looking nice guy hasn’t caught her attention, then he isn’t a ‘challenge’ for the woman at all. So she will make no attempts in overcoming that ‘challenge’. Why? Because if she doesn’t make attempts in getting him, then she isn’t losing any treasure at all, which is the ugly object that never caught her ‘attention’.

  42. Jaded says:

    @ The Autistic Gamer
    Dancing, martial arts and a few other things do allow guys and girls to touch the bodies of each other. But the touching is limited. And so it builds limited confidence in guys. What I am saying is that, dancing/martial arts will allow you to touch the hands, arms, shoulders, hip, legs, face and neck of a girl. A guy will be comfortable in touching those parts of a female. But those are only body parts he will be comfortable with, in touching the female. Once he has no problems in touching a female in those parts, he gets stuck again. This is because those are the only parts of a female that he can touch. He can’t touch her other body parts because the dancing that he is doing, doesn’t require/allow him to touch her other body parts apart from the ones that he is required to touch. So that way, the confidence level of a guy increases to a point and then it stops there. In the end the guy will also realize that even though he is comfortable in touching the female body and has a lot of confidence, he can only succeed in getting laid or even losing his virginity, ‘if’ the girl allows him to. What I am saying is: you can have all the confidence in the world, but if the girl doesn’t let you have sex with her, then you are still left as a virgin.

    You can confidently go to a store, pick a shirt, try it on and get comfortable with it. You go to the owner and get ready to pay him the full amount, but he doesn’t want to sell you the shirt. He replies that he isn’t interested in selling you the shirt. So there isn’t anything you can do to buy the shirt and have it for yourself. You can have all the confidence, but if the store owner doesn’t allow/let you buy and have the shirt, then in the end you are still without a shirt.

    The same applies for guys. They can get totally comfortable with the female body and have all the confidence, but if the girl doesn’t allow/let him have sex with her, then in the end he still can’t get laid and will possibly even remain a virgin.

  43. theasdgamer says:

    @Jaded

    Dancing solves the problem of the cold approach. You have an opportunity to talk with a woman and ask her for her phone no. Yeah, you still have to build comfort, instigate, isolate, and escalate, but for guys who have trouble getting the nerve for cold approaches, dancing is great. Eventually you approach groups of girls and ask them if any of them know how to dance and then face down the alpha bitch and take one of her pack to dance with and get to know.

  44. ShuckCorn says:

    Good article. I was a virgin until I was 29… Now I’m almost 30 and I’m trying to turn myself into the fuck-machine women supposedly desire. You know… a confident, bad-boy, muscular, and groomed alpha male. Funny that I have to work hard to turn myself into someone I hate. I guess it will be worth it when I am hate-fucking bitch after bitch. ;-D

  45. Deansdale says:

    I don’t see why anyone should hate being confident, muscular or groomed (that being a funny way of saying you care about your appearance). All this means you’re healthy and take care of yourself. If you want to turn into a bad-boy, or hate-fuck anyone, that’s another question, completely up to your personality.

  46. Lon Spector says:

    I agree with Jaded, but for different reasons. The key is in the Astrological
    chart. When you have a terrible Astrological chart like myself, and I suspect
    Jaded, we have NO CHANCE. That’s why I am a 56 year old virgin, and why I
    want to die so bad I can taste it.

  47. burtyburt says:

    I think every man can get laid very easily if you follow the easy steps:
    1 stop jerking off. If you do you’ll eventually get horny enough to do something about it.
    2 lower your standards. Everybody knows someone who they could probably be having sex with right now, but they’re “too fat” or “too ugly”. Chances are if you start dating this person he or she will improve their looks because of all the affection you are showing.
    3. Be yourself and Respect yourself. She will love you if be yourself, nice guy or bad guy. But most of all stand up for yourself, if she treats you like shit tell her quick to go fuck herself!

  48. Lon Spector says:

    Girls can certainly get “it” if the man is desperate enough.
    I knew a woman who had facial hair B.O., a twisted mouth from an untreated
    stroke-FILTHY, and EVEN she was married!

  49. Brad says:

    Hey I made added some info here just a few minutes back. I think it could be very helpful for a lot of men out there.

    PLEASE, Please do not post my full name! First name is fine and I have no problem with that. Email listed with this post is same as my previous post.
    Thanks much.

  50. Brad says:

    I am putting this out there for those who despair about not getting laid. This should make you feel a lot better about your self. IT COULD BE FAR WORSE THAN YOU COULD POSSIBLE IMAGINE but, never give up, I haven’t’!

    As a reasonably attractive male, I have not been on a date, had a kiss, or sex since the age of 17 years old. No, that’s not typo. . . . .

    All of my live, I have always strived to improve my communication and approach skills. When I was in my 20s and 30s, there were no such things as dating sites, dating coaches, or MeetUp groups. I have been using these now for several years in an attempt to attract a mate or at lease to get a date but, with out any success, so far at least.

    Over the last several years I have read, practiced, re-read, re-read again and again the sources of dating education and tools at the end of this letter and still have no success. I have probably devotes thousands of hours to reseach, reading, and practice in the real world. I have numerous stories I could tell you of my adventures and failures in my life long search, sometimes funny, other times just sad.

    A week ago I tried Speed Dating again and thought I had made really good impressions with 8 of 14 women I met and had fun. I was surprised to learn however, that none of these selected me as a match.

    Last year I saw a psychologist to make sure that I was not mentally ill. She did assist me at becoming more confortable in talking with new people, which I do now with no problem at all. Over all she thought I better ballaced than most of friends and was also amazed that women were not literally chasing me. Shoot, I know enough now to be a professional dating coach.

    Recently I did reach out to a well-known local dating coach, Beth Hopper who has been written about in the Denver Post. I provided her the basic same information that’s I included here. She too was amazed by my efforts and the fact that I was still unsuccessful. She didn’t think that she could provide any help to me in addition to what I have already been learning.

    In my early 20s and a few times in my early 30s, I had considered suicide as an option but, eventually came to the conclusion that God must have some reason for doing this. Lately I have begun to have second thoughts but, still would never go though such a thing, instead I’m just more determined that ever to solve this issue and now spend about all of my 98% of free time to this effort.

    Yesterday, I had my 1st date in 37 years. It went pretty good. Maybe there’s a God after all.
    I’ll try to add good sources of helpful info in my next post.

  51. Brad says:

    I have repeatedly tried to add the sources I mentioned in my last post but, for some reason this blog will not seem to accept any of them, no matter how short I make this list. I will keep trying as it good stuff to know about and can help you as it has me.

  52. Brad says:

    Here is another attempt to list some of the useful information out there that I have used.
    Body Language 101 – David Lambert
    Body Language and Attraction v2.0 – Joanne Fallwater
    Body Language – Dahlia Salvatore
    Date or Soul Mate – Neil Clark Warren
    How to Ace Your First Date – Chelsea Kaplan
    How to Be a Sexy Man – Chase Amante
    How To Convey Confidence To A Woman – Christian Thorne
    How To Get A Girl Friend Dating OnLine- Rober Belland
    How To Instantly Connect With Anyone – Leil Lowndes
    How to Make Girls Chase – Chase Amante
    How to Puck Up Girls – Ricardus Domino
    How to Talk to Women. . .And Get Laid BradDP
    How to Use the Sexual Frame to Turn Women On – Ricardus Domino
    It’s Not You, It’s Biology – Joe Quirk
    Leave A Lasting Impression – LaDawn Black
    Lessons Learned From A Life Spent In Bars – Derek Cajun
    Magic Bullet – Savoy
    Perfect Personality Profiles – Helen Baron
    Secrets Of Sexual Tension – Vin DiCarlo
    Seduce With Style 2.0 Secrets of Men’s Style And Seduction – Vince Lin
    Seduction Science – Derek Vitalio
    Sex Talk – Carole Altman, PhD
    Speed Seduction Patterns By theGuru (Abee)
    The Art of Conversation – Marcia Jedd
    The Men’s Health and Women’s Health Big Book of Sex
    Mystery Method Second Eduction – Author Unknow
    The Art of Seduction – Robert Greene
    The Pickup Artist – Chris Odom
    The TAO of BadAss – Joshua Pellicer
    Secrets Of Speed Seduction – Ross Jeffries

  53. Brad says:

    Also go out to MeetUp groups. There’s lots out there. Go to MeetUp.com and search for Single or Dating in your city.

  54. Brad says:

    Also there a lot of books and videos out there by David DeAngelo and Carlos Xuma that have helped me a lot as well. One of these days, I’ll eventually succeed and get me a girlfriend too. Also, remember those Meetup groups. Some of them are specifically aimed as helping guys like us.

  55. don Fefinho says:

    @Alex001
    Allow me a guess: had been raised by a single/divorced mom, eh? Just my speculation, but that would explain a lot.

  56. Brad says:

    Good guess and correct.

  57. James says:

    If your upset being nice hasn’t gotten you laid then you may want to reconsider how ‘nice’ you really are. You may not like the bad guys who game women to get laid but being nice to a woman in an attempt to get laid is the same damned thing just far less effective. A truly nice guy is nice to everyone and expects nothing in return. I consider myself a nice guy but when I’m around an attractive women I absolutely do NOT try to be nice because even for me it really is hard to tell how much is genuine and how much is just an attempt to impress. Besides, attractive ladies get plenty of attention, guys do all sorts of dumb shit to get close so really if your a nice guy your best bet is just to be yourself and try your best to treat her like she is just someone normal. Save the nice act for the less fortunate, for people you are not attracted to, for the elderly, etc…those people are more likely to appreciate it.

  58. Deansdale says:

    “If your upset being nice hasn’t gotten you laid then you may want to reconsider how ‘nice’ you really are.”

    This is bullshit. Boys are taught everywhere that they can win women’s hearts by being nice. No wonder many of them are disappointed when they do what they’ve been told to do and it fails to work every fuckin’ time.

    “A truly nice guy is nice to everyone and expects nothing in return.”

    That’s not a nice guy, that’s Forrest Gump or Jesus Christ. Then again, it is an idiotic notion that nice guys want to “buy sex” with faked niceness. They want to get intimate with someone (which is only natural for everyone) and they try to initiate things the only way they know how: by acting like a decent human being. Nice job shaming them for it.

    You are a decent human being, but being rejected disappoints you? How dare you, you mean bastard!!! Being disappointed means you’re not a decent human being afterall.

  59. James says:

    Hmm, didn’t expect that kind of reaction. But you made my point for me: “Boys are taught everywhere that they can win women’s hearts by being nice.” In other words they are taught how to play women, albeit poorly — that if they alter their behavior a certain way they can get what they want. And that was the point I was trying to make before but I realized while writing this response that no matter what you do it can be seen as a play. Even being nice there are many ways you can approach a girl, many things you can say or do, its all about learning and adapting and experimenting and if that sounds like a game to you well, sorry to say but it kind of is.

    And just for the record I’m in the same damned boat as you guys. I’m severely shy though so most people don’t even realize I’m nice, they think I’m a jerk because I don’t respond to them the way they expect me to. I hate thinking about this like a game but I’m starting to get over it. So where am I at right now: Small talk. Even small talk can be turned into a fucking game but at least it’s a game I’m comfortable playing at the moment. I still suck at it but I’m getting better. The other game I’m comfortable playing: Talking to women with no other purpose then to be rejected — not like a jerk or anything, just as myself but with different expectations and, at first, different targets. And guess what: It was exactly what I needed. I now approach all women with no expectations, just a small hope, and I am not hurt much at all when I am rejected — the way it should have always been.

  60. Jaded says:

    The problem is mostly with those clowns who conned guys into being nice to girls. And now it has spoiled everything. Some guys are born nice, others program themselves at a very young age to become nice to girls. They are told that being nice to a girl will get them that girl. It is their reward – just like in a Disney movie. But when it doesn’t work, those same ‘nice’ guys start thinking about where did they go wrong. They run back to all those old men and women and even their parents, and they tell the nice guys that either they did something wrong while being nice to the girl, the girl must be with some other guy, or there are plenty of other fish in the sea, bullshit. The nice guys approach other girls and the result is the same. And then, some ‘Mr. Know It All’ will show up and tell the guys that they are doing everything wrong. They’ll tell the nice guys to follow what they did and it is guaranteed that they’ll get a girl and lose their virginity. And then when the nice guys try all of those, and still end up where they originally were, the ‘Mr. Know It All’ will take the easy way out and blame the nice guys about not being confident or any other excuse they can come up with.

    So, my point is, the nice guys have been told all the wrong stuff about girls and made to do all the wrong things. It is time to look at all these problems deeper, break it down and then design a game that actually works for nice guys.

    If nothing is done to get nice guys, girls, then guys like Lon Spector will not only end up and die alone, but also end up ending this entire family line and bloodline with him. What if Lon Spector is the last member left in his family with no other members around to continue it? Would any girls (who may be reading this) actually realize this and step up, and say that yes you would like to become his wife and enable him to have children so that his family line can continue instead of it becoming extinct?

  61. Deansdale says:

    “Hmm, didn’t expect that kind of reaction.”

    Nothing personal, I just think that telling nice guys if they want sex they are “fakes” is a form of shaming language. You can be a genuine nice guy and still feel disappointed after a romantic prospect rejects you.

    “they are taught how to play women, albeit poorly”

    That is if you approach the subject in bad faith. Nobody says that if you act like a decent human being panties will fall off instantly. They teach kids to show respect and act nice for the sake of being a good person, and say that’ll make women see you’re a decent guy. Well, that is actually true – what they don’t say is “being decent” means nothing romantically. So, those poor guys don’t want to manipulate women by being nice, they are simply nice. (And feminists shame them for it.)

    “that no matter what you do it can be seen as a play”

    Yep :) Feminists play this card all the time. What you do is utterly irrelevant, you are being manipulative, period. Which is silly. Women are a lot more manipulative than men, it’s simple projection on their part.

    “its all about learning and adapting and experimenting and if that sounds like a game to you well, sorry to say but it kind of is”

    There’s no problem with learning from experience. You’d be stupid not to.

    “I’m in the same damned boat as you guys”

    I had a vague feeling yesterday that you are, but as I said, I don’t like nice guys being vilified. They have enough problems already without others accusing them of being worse than “bad guys”. Your intentions are good, but you seem to have adopted a piece of feminist propaganda :)

  62. Deansdale says:

    “And then when the nice guys try all of those, and still end up where they originally were, the ‘Mr. Know It All’ will take the easy way out and blame the nice guys about not being confident or any other excuse they can come up with.”

    The first step is the hardest one. It’s not an easy way out, it’s the simple truth. Most guys project a really weird vibe at first when they try game, and it shows. When you’re anxious or afraid nothing will get you laid. This is why 90% of newbies fail. I want to help them – this is why I blog(ged) – but it’s never easy regardless of my intentions.

    “What if Lon Spector is the last member left in his family with no other members around to continue it?”

    You can’t expect anyone to bear your children just because you’re antisocial. It is your job as a human being to attract someone from the opposite sex. If you can’t do it, well, tough luck – pay escorts or learn how to do it the hard way. No government agency or private company will assign a wife to you. Your options are limited: 1. prostitution, 2. game, 3. celibacy (and slowly going insane). I advise everyone to go for a combination of the first two – paying for sex first will help you get it for free later.

  63. James says:

    “Your intentions are good, but you seem to have adopted a piece of feminist propaganda :)”

    You are probably right but I never really understood what a feminist was so I like to believe I came to that conclusion on my own :) Its really just the ‘getting laid’ part that bothers me I could get laid if I wanted to but that isn’t my goal. My ex-girlfriend is always willing and it doesn’t happen often but I’ve met some very sexual ladies that I have had to physically push off me because I find that sort of thing to be a huge turn-off.

    I guess that just puts me in a similar boat. I have an ex-girlfriend and I was with her a long time and we have a few kids together. She is the only one I’ve ever slept with though and I’ve only been on 1 date in the past three years since we broke up while she has dated 5 or 6 men and has been engaged twice. Its very frustrating because she is very manipulative and likes to play games (no trouble lying to men at all) while I can barely even get a date because I refuse to be that way.

  64. Oldpuller says:

    What you do is arrange a meetup via a dating site (easiest way), hire an escort a few hours before the date. When the escort has satisfied your needs and you have paid, then go on your first date. Do not shower but use lots of aftershave.

    You will come across as very non-needy indeed. Your date will interpret you as an alpha male who gets a lot, and she will subconsciously smell the other female, proving the point. This will get her competitive and turned on. Use usual pua methods and get her laid.

    Then arrange another date asap via the dating site and continue until you have laid three ladies, don’t worry about looks at this stage.

    Now you have a rotation and are non sexually needy, so now go on dates outside of the three and whever you get one you prefer to the others, dump one of the three and put her into rotation.

    Rinse and repeat.

    Remmeber though, this is a lot of work, you are going to be very busy and tired indeed.

  65. El CApo says:

    hello guys :)
    first sorry for my english …but i have been reading this and i liked some opions…. i wouldnt be reading this if i wasnt looking for some information..or wanting to know things better.
    so i will try to tell about my view about this topic
    im 30 years old guy and handsome and cute ” according to them ” ,and i know also that im ok looking according to me.and i have confidance on myself and i know it .im not virgin but almost cos durning 4 years i only fucked 2 times ..lol,this makes me laugh and makes me cry too
    im a nice guy and gentelman ,sometimes i think onenight things arent good for me ,but of course i want to fuck as much as i can ;) i was looking for a girl that i can have a deep conversation ,date with and stuff like that..i was going to clubs ,trying to talk with girls ,ask for dance or drink and beeing gentel …..all what i get is a NO…
    and sometimes i really hate how girls can be fake..one time i aproched a girl i asked about her name ..and she lied about even her name ,,cos i heared her telling to her freind ,,that Now you have to call me like this …straight when i heard her saying that …i said adios,im a persone that i dont accepte to take any shittt from any bitch even if she has a golden pussy ..anyway
    sometimes i really have the skill of readying the lips and hearing what people talk even in loud music atmosphere,many times when i try to aproche ,i knew that the girl said something bad at me to her freind ,i go quitley near her ear and answer her according how she is rude…
    and its not just in the clubs ,its everywhere ,i try to play the picking up game in malls ,and stuff ,it went same .sometimes when a girl smiles to me i go to talk with her ,by trying to ask her number ,comes the answer NO but i have a boyfreind..this makes me laugh and ask triple quirstions about girls…and now when i go to aproche i knew already that its a NO answer ,,so after all this i decided to stop even talking to girls…
    the funny thing is everytime i go out people says that you gonna get 10 girls tonight this and that …balbla bla..somepeople say that i look angry ..i look like angry antnio banderas..thats what they say..but i really dont smile alot and i dont find it reasonable to smile withoout a reason ,,and i like to go out alone and sometimes just be alone
    im a serious persone and im tired of talking so much bullshit ,again and again to get laid….
    for me i tried hard i guess ,and also i know myself so why we should blame ourselfs about things ,after all these experinces ,i decided that if a bitch doesnt want me once ,i will not want her 1000 time.and i start puting a red cross on all of them ,
    so you pro guys tell me whats wrong ?

  66. cb says:

    Hey quantomleap please don’t breed!

  67. cb says:

    Yeah also if you are arguing with Jaded about the whole being attracted to ugly or nonugly guys issue know that you are scietifically incorrect to disagree.

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