If you can’t get laid, read this

This post is for those who really can’t get laid. I’m talking about this:

I know dozens of guys like me. Late 20′s, next to no sexual experience.

I think first of all you have to sit down and answer the question of why you can’t get laid. If you come up with an answer like looks, money or culture, you’re wrong. Guys with worse looks and less money than you get laid all the time in every part of the world. If you think long enough about it you can’t avoid reaching a conclusion which is simple and logical but hard to accept: the problem which prevents you from getting laid is in your head. It’s not clothes or wallets; it’s something you think or say or do.

The hardest thing for many of us is letting go of our beliefs. I know because I’ve been trapped in this situation for quite some time in my younger days. I didn’t seem to have much success with girls but I always thought I was doing things the right way – only the world was somehow “wrong”. It was the “girls’ fault”. Looking back it’s clear to me that I was a stereotypical nice guy thoroughly indoctrinated by all the nonsense I was bombarded with regarding women and dating. And the biggest problem was not that I did stupid things, but that I was absolutely sure that I was doing what I was supposed to do. And I was confused as hell when things didn’t work out. I was a kind of a white knight who pedestalized girls because “that was the decent thing to do”. I imagined myself to be a prince on a white horse who’ll endure any pain for his princess. I thought I’d show my strength by taking and withstanding any shit thrown my way and sadly I failed to realize that girls were looking for guys who showed their strength by not taking any shit at all.

So, what I mean is probably the biggest hurdle you’ll ever face regarding dating is admitting that the problem is in your own head. It might be the way you view women, or the way you view yourself. Maybe you’re not bold enough. Probably you suffer from oneitis. All the things which you must overcome to get laid are in your head and you’re the one who’s not willing to let go of these ideas. Stop blaming the world and fighting against it, it won’t do you any good. You’re not the tragic hero of the show turning into a “martyr for love”, you’re just an everyday fellow whose head has been filled with lies. Admit it and get over it. The sooner the better.

A few examples of these lies which make men think they’re morally superior to others but in fact only make them fail at getting laid:

The most obvious ones are of course the ones that say you should treat girls nicely. You should carry their bags at school or buy them drinks in bars. Always be polite and do what-the-fuck-ever she wants you to do. Try to read her mind and always do everything you can to please her. Hollywood and feminism indoctrinates you with this sh*t and it’s so deeply engraved in your mind that you really and truly can’t understand how could it be that thugs screw the best women while you get LJBFs.

You might often hear that if you want to get good with women you’ll have to have practice. But since you’ve been indoctrinated by hollywood and feminism, you find this idea repulsive. You think that you only supposed to try to get into the pants hearts of girls you’re in love with.

A touchier issue is using escorts. It is very basic knowledge in PU (PickUp) circles that neediness kills a girl’s attraction towards you. You could “cure” neediness by using escorts but that’s unimaginable for you because… you’ve been indoctrinated by hollywood and feminism and find this idea repulsive. (As a side note I’d say that if you’re over 20 and still a virgin you should immediately pick up the phone and call an escort.)

Somewhere along the way you’ll have to recognise that imaginary moral high grounds and success with women doesn’t mix and you’ll have to choose between them. I believe by now the choice is easy, but hey, if you still want the moral high ground by all means indulge yourself – it means more women are left for me.

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187 Responses to If you can’t get laid, read this

  1. ThinkingMan says:

    Good post.

    Don’t forget that religious feminism has brainwashed an entire generation of sexually frustrated white knights who get blown off by church girls who like riding bad boy cock or even if they don’t, do not consider their male counterparts as desirable compared with players and non-church men. Want to find pussified girly-men manginas? No better place to find them than in church.

    I’m not advocating immorality, that’s not my intended point. No, my point is that if a guy wants to learn of manhood and attracting the opposite sex, most churches don’t have a clue and actually are a breeding ground for sexually frustrated men who view life through an idealistic prism not shared by so many of their female church member counterparts.

    That’s what happens when you get your manhood ideals from girly-men henpecked pastors/hubbies or worse yet, unsatisfied married women who play the part of the happy wife but are anything but that in their homes.

  2. sestamibi says:

    I fully concur and then some. I only wish I had known these things back when it made a difference to me (I’ll be 60 soon).

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  5. Gorbachev says:

    Churches are bad news for breeding men that can, well, breed.

    Always have been.

    Men have to learn everything they need to know outside the church.

  6. Frankie says:

    True that. The bitches want the bad boy cock, nice guys finish LAST…I should know, cuz I finished dead last. But, I do get the last laugh… cuz now I actually have money, since I didn’t have to spend it all on BITCHES. Thank you.

  7. Davey says:

    I was told once that I am the nicest guy left on the planet. So, of course, I can’t get laid. I treat women with respect; I have a great sense of humor; I’m easy to get along with and easy to please. So, of course, I can’t get laid.
    But, if I was an asshole who cared only about myself, force myself on women, treat them like crap, or was dumb as an ox, then, OBVIOUSLY I would get laid.

  8. Yeah, it’s the same deal as golf…my head starts thinking and fucks up my game. Anyway, I’m with Frankie…I definitely have more $$ than I would if I was getting laid.

  9. Quantumleap says:

    I’m one of those ‘bad boys’ mentioned here and I can tell you firsthand I’ve got all my money too.

    Just another symptom of the mistaken mindset of the ‘nice guy’. Who spends their cash on ‘bitches’?!!! After we’ve had sex I’m willing to go 50/50 with the occasional gesture of paying for everything or a gift because the ‘bitch’ has earned it. You want to get laid? Make her pay for her own shit or at the very least make sure you’re getting something in return. ie reverse kino, her undivided attention, a kiss etc which is building towards a lay.

    Nice guys think paying for things on a ‘date’ is ‘nice’ and going to make the girl like you more. It DOESN’T fellas!! Get that through your thick nice guy heads. Women want men who challenge them. Who make them earn the man’s approval and validation. It’s not the other way around boys.

    Learn game and learn how to make those vaginas tingle. Not dry up like a box crusty old raisins left out in the sun too long. Because that’s exactly what lame ass nice guy behavior accomplishes and only that.

  10. Alex001 says:

    Nice guys finish last, or not at all. I am past the point of trying to work on my “game” to get laid.

    Nothing i do or say makes any difference. I am 26, aesthetically attractive, well-spoken, funny and outgoing. Too bad im also a nice guy who gets shit on by everyone in the world.


  11. Nick says:

    Alex001 – You sound just like me brother. You know what man, in all honesty, the whole dam world is superficial and dumb as fuck, and anyone who tells me differently should get their head knocked off! The best advice I can give you (which I’ve just very recently taken upon myself) is to just LET GO! Stop trying, stop giving a fuck —- just FUCK IT!!! The way I see it, let the chips fall where they may, and who knows, maybe something great will come along, something better than you ever expected. Be a good person, do the right things, not because you’re supposed to, but because it comes from your heart. Be genuine and ultimately just be you. That right there is the definition of LIVING WELL!!!

  12. Robert says:

    This is largely BS. The fact that you said you should pay for sex if you’re a virgin over 20 is the first sign of that. I’ve had plenty of girls come onto me and I’m a nice guy. This whole “nice guys finish last” stuff is BS. Being a nice guy who treats females with respect isn’t synonymous with being a pushover who lets girls walk all over him. The difference between a pushover and an attractive man boils down to one thing. Self respect. I open doors for girls, I do them favors like I would anyone else, I talk to them about their lives like I would with anyone else, and yes, they call me a sweet nice guy, but at the same time they come onto me. Do you know why? Because I know where to draw the line. Guy or girl, if they’re giving me crap I don’t put up with it. Women are attracted to men they respect and are in control of their situation. The reason women aren’t attracted to pushover “nice guys” is because they don’t respect themselves, they aren’t assertive, their persona lacks any real power and they’re just plain boring. Doesn’t mean you have to be a punk and act like a jerk. Plus if you’re willing to alter your personality and be a jerk to get laid you are truly a pathetic person who has no self worth. Focus on becoming the man you want to be and accomplishing what you’re passionate about and women will be attracted to you.

  13. Deansdale says:

    Oh sure, it is so simple – yet somehow millions have serious problems with dating. But worry no more, captain Robert is here and he solves all your problems by saying ‘just be confident’. Cool.
    Also please show me where I said you should “be a punk and act like a jerk”. Until then, fock off.

  14. Alex001 says:

    I am angry and frustrated about my lack of a sexlife, but i also recognize its my own fault.

    I have no self-respect, self-esteem or feeling of being worhtwhile at all. My anger at the world is only a symptom of my own inability to realize my full potential.

    No amount of “manning-up” ever works… you come across as insincere, which is almost as bad as being desperate.

    I am a uselss human being.

  15. Deansdale says:

    Try to relax. You know you’re not useless, you are just frustrated.

  16. half ass says:

    dude i hate women now its bad

  17. Alex001 says:

    I dont hate women, i just hate myself. I am a piece of shit with nothing positive to offer a woman, thats why ill always be alone.

    I feel completely emasculated by my own inability to be a real man. Its a never-ending cycle of bullshit. I am a desperate pussy, and its my own fault. Fuck my life.

  18. anton says:

    alex001 i feel with you. I am in the same situation and frustrated as hell. Well, we have no choice than learning to respect ourselves and getting our self-esteem back. Dont let your hope down, although I am frustrated and didnt had sex for 3 years, it can only get better. Lets see it as a chance for us to grow more into the person we have to be. Its a hard world we live in and people can be mean, ecspecially if you are shy, different than most people. We have to adapt, we have no other choice man, if we dont change we will end up alone. See it as an opportunity to change, I try to see it that way. Good luck to you man.

  19. circlebill says:

    As I see it, the real problem for nice guys lies in the element of CARING! All genuine nice guys CARE a very great deal about women and and their feelings! Every nice guy really does try to be like a legendary knight in shining armor! Unfortunately, most women lack the maturity and understanding to appreciate the righteous devotion being lavished on them! When a very CARING nice guy caters to a woman as though she were a legendary Queen-Goddess, the woman only sees a weak man who must be a pushover! That’s the result of so much CARING!

    On the other hand, if the nice guy gives up the element of CARING and instead treats a woman like she was yesterday’s garbage, he will suddenly be seen by her as strong and manly! And so the answer is for nice guys to stop all this unappreciated high devotion and CARING! Women like this need to be treated as easily replaced disposables of little value! They need to know that they’ll be thrown aside at the drop of a hat!

    Without the element of CARING, a man can approach a hundred women and more without fearing the pain of rejection! If he finds just five willing women out of each hundred approaches, he’s well on his way to becoming a player with lots of girlfriends! By sifting through hundreds of women, he’ll polish his approach and improve his numbers and quickly discard women that he’s tired of! Of course the man won’t be a nice guy any more! He may not even be a decent human being any more! He may never actually love or CARE again! But that’s the kind of man most women choose and deserve!

  20. Deansdale says:

    I don’t quite agree but everybody is entitled to their own opinions :)

  21. Alex001 says:

    Still useless…. and you’re right. I really shouldnt CARE anymore. Im at the point where ive stopped approaching women alltogether. I think ive pretty much just resigned myself to the fact that im gonna be alone, and so id rather just enjoy my day.
    I have no use for women other than to fuck them, and they dont seem to be interested in that. Now I just stay away, and i dont even respond when a girl talks or smiles at me. Fuck women, im done.
    From now on its boxing, camping and smoking weed on the agenda.
    Oh yea, and rubbing one out every morning.

  22. Zak582 says:

    i’m fucked up. i can say fuck my life wit a smile on my face. i been a nice guy for MOST of my life. i’m 19, not a virgin but still feel like one(cuz i got set up wit an ugly girl at 18, pressured into it, n she got more pleasure than i did. wtf?), may hav personality disorders cuz of my unwanted celibacy in high school, may be emo to, maybe masochistic. wow i bitch alot lol no wonder i can’t get laid by a beautiful girl(even though there may be more reasons why i can’t get laid but like hell people would wanna hear me talk. i’m depressed again. FUCK! i may jus need someone i can talk to bout this shit though. guess this is my only source)

  23. Deansdale says:

    Well, I’m glad you had a place to vent :) I know this does not really help but you’re way too young to draw serious conclusions. Most guys (80%+) your age have problems like you. If you persist, and are willing to work, things will get better.

  24. Regret says:

    try to funnel these bad emotions into something that will help you get girls. When you feel like shit try to go work out. Get muscular and in shape. Hopefully girls will hit on you and you dont even have to know how to “woo” women. If thats too hard to do and you still really want to get women but are to pussy to work for it, you can get ur nuts surgically removed so you can stop desiring them and live a life thats not full of pain which is pointless to live!

  25. Anyone can get laid says:

    It either takes coke or money to get pussy at the drop of a hat. Anything else you should be looking for is ideally a person with a great personality/intelligence/looks depending on respective ages. Leave the strictly blue-balls business as a transaction— that’s my motto.

  26. Bad Nice Guy says:

    Here’s what worked for me as an eighteen-year-old nice guy with a friend who was lovely, engaged, and a little older. Isolate, then instigate. Show courage and admit that you’re scared, tell her that you like her and that she’s lovely, then ask her. Chicks like courage even more than confidence, but you have to let them know that you’re scared as hell to ask them. Don’t ask at a bar or in any group setting. It has to be done privately. I had to do two isolates to get to a really private place. I told her I wanted to talk to her and needed to ask her in private. First time she walked with me to a corner of the college restaurant. I explained that it wasn’t private enough and she took me to her dorm room. I’m sure she suspected what I was going to ask and she didn’t make it too easy to ask her–she teased me at first instead of answering directly, then reminded me that she was engaged. There were a couple of awkward pauses as I struggled to get the words out. We did it for a week.

    I was never a cocky asshole this whole time. I never felt any real confidence.

    I only ever tried this approach once and never again; I found out that I pair-bonded quickly and intensely. The break up was very hard on me. If you suspect that you pair-bond quickly and intensely, you might not want to do this.

    This approach could work in asking a desirable woman for a date, but probably only if you get to know her first and become friends. Isolating and instigating show leadership. Obviously, the instigation is for a date.

  27. Jaded says:

    Number 1
    Has anyone noticed that during their younger days, the bad boys do all their usual asshole/jerk stuff, and they get girl after girl and have sex with all the women they can. Then when they finally get married and are 40+ and have kids, most (not all) of them turn into nice guys preaching all this being kind towards others, respecting and helping everyone bullshit. It is like, after they have had all the fun they wanted to (during their bad boy years), they have now retired and turned into these hypocrite saints telling everyone that it is wrong to be a bad boy and that being a nice guy is the only way to heaven. It seems more like they are ashamed of their own doings during their bad boy days, and now they are just trying to pay for their crimes by doing community service through their ironic preaching about kindness, respect and being helpful to others garbage.

    Number 2
    The other thing that I’ve noticed is that, a lot of people (or the smartypants wise guys) seem to think that if you are some 30 (or 40) year old hopeless loser virgin who sits at home 24/7 365 days a year with a boner because you can’t get a girl for yourself, then the solution is to turn into a Bad Boy and be a jerk to girls, and then you’ll magically get laid and lose your virginity. What I’m saying is that, these wise asses think that if you stop being a nice guy who respects girls, and turn into a Bad Boy and stop respecting girls, then you’ll automatically get laid.

    What these guys don’t realize is that there are a lot of factors at play when you are trying to attract a girl. And a major factor about the guy attracting the girl is: (a) looks, and (b) personality/characteristics/attitude. So let’s say there is a guy who is good looking, cute or hot. So he will already have the attention of girls towards him because of his looks. But that just means that the girl is 50% attracted to him. Now let’s say the guy has a bad attitude, is a jerk/player/cheater and has the personality about not giving a sh!t about what others (mostly girls) think about him. Then this is the other remaining 50% of the attractiveness the girl has towards him, because she sees him as a brave guy/hero/leader or the dominating/superior male due to him not being a sissy crybaby who worries too much about what others think of him and always trying to please everyone. So this guy already has the looks. This gets the attraction of the girl (or her heart) towards the guy from starting at 0 and then increasing to 50%. And then the guy also has the right attitude, that is the Bad Boy. So this gets the remaining attraction of the girl (or her p(_)ssy) towards the guy. Why? Because the guy is a turn on for the girl and he is a good provider for her children who will also have stronger genes from the father. So since she is already attracted towards him 50% due to his looks, another 50% of her attractiveness is added to that because he has the right attitude (Bad Boy) that she is looking for. So this causes her to be attracted to the guy, 100%. And so, the guy can just sit back and relax, while the girl approaches him, spreads her legs, sits on him and starts bouncing on his you-know-what.

    Now what I’ll say next is the important part that makes things clear, removes our confusion and answers the question, why most of us nice guys have to use our hands to sympathies with our depressed boners everyday, even if we may be good looking. So like I described in the previous paragraph about the (a) looks and (b) personality/characteristics/attitude, the same applies here. Let’s say there is a guy who is good looking, cute or hot. So he will already have the attention of girls towards him because of his looks. But that just means that the girl is 50% attracted to him. Now let’s say the guy is a nice guy, tries to make everyone happy (including the girl), is always available for the girl, does whatever she says, always does what is morally right, is an honest guy who always speaks the truth, thinks and puts the needs of the society first even if it is at his expense, and always thinks about what the girl thinks about him if he does this or that. And so this is the other remaining 50% of the attractiveness the girl could have had towards him, but she doesn’t.

    Why? Because she sees him as a weak guy/cowardly/follower or the submissive/inferior male, due to him being a sissy crybaby pushover who worries too much about what others think of him, and is always trying to please everyone instead of doing things for his own self and his future wife (the girl) and her children. So, this guy already has the looks. This gets the attraction of the girl (or her heart) towards the guy from starting at 0 and then increasing to 50%. But then the guy has the wrong attitude, that is the Nice Guy. So this makes the remaining attraction of the girl (or her p(_)ssy) towards the guy, to actually not be attracted. Why? Because the guy is a turn-off and a bad provider for her children who will also have weaker genes from the father. So since she is attracted towards him 50% due to his looks, the other 50% of her attractiveness is not added to that because he has the wrong attitude (Nice Guy), that she isn’t looking for. So this causes her to be attracted to the guy only 50% out of 100. What this means is that girls are attracted to the nice guy, but only to the good looking nice guys. So it is a 50-50 thing. A few girls will be willing to sleep with the good looking nice guys (where the guy loses his virginity), while the other average or below average looking nice guys can just sit back and relax, while the girl comes towards him, and then as she gets closer, she walks straight past him and then goes to the bad boy that I described 2 paragraphs ago, spreads her legs, sits on him and starts bouncing on his you-know-what, while the boner of the nice guy turns around, looks at the nice guy and says: “Dude, WTF?!!!” And then the boner turns to where it faced before, slants a bit downwards and starts crying, while the nice guy puts a hand on its head and says while comforting it: “There, there” And lies: “Don’t feel bad. You’ll get your turn someday”

    Number 3
    Now for the Mr. Know It Alls. You guys think that just because you succeeded in getting laid even though you’re a Nice Guy, so you are the ones doing everything right while the other Nice Guys did everything wrong? So you guys are the ones full of confidence while the other Nice Guys lack confidence? Guess what, Nerds? You guys weren’t doing anything right at all (perhaps a few of you did). Neither were you truly confident enough. So how did you guys lose your virginity? I’ll tell you how. You guys, simply got LUCKY. You Mr. Know It All nerds, lost your virginity, by FLUKE. You lost your virginity by chance simply because everything went your way. The reality is that most of you Mr. Know It All Nice Guys were good looking, but lacked the Bad Boy attitude. So you were sitting on the 50-50 fence that I described in the above paragraph, and then a few girls who ignored your lack of bad boy attitude and focused totally on your cuteness and overruled their p(_)ssies (that lusted for bad boys) with the combined effort from their minds and hearts, had sex with you. So that’s how you got lucky and lost your virginity during the one night stand or even if the relationship lasted, then it wasn’t for long. So you Mr. Know It Alls don’t really have what it takes to get laid and lose your virginity. You guys just got lucky. So please don’t accuse the other Nice Guys of this or that, or whatever you Mr. Know It Alls will think about and blame.

  28. Deansdale says:

    You are jaded, I can attest to that…

    Not everything is up to luck. You can experience the different outcomes when you try different approaches.

  29. As regards the practices of Christians seeking marriage, here are some thoughts about possibly appropriate sexualization:

    I’ve taught my adult daughter that it’s Ok to sexualize and also to dial back the sexualization, depending on the necessity. A single, chaste woman who is seeking marriage needs to indicate that she is a sexual being and also that she wants to maintain her chastity. It’s Ok for her to say, “If we were married I’d be all over you.” It’s also Ok for her to say, “Sorry, that will have to wait for marriage.” She might also say, “If you’re so interested in my body, why haven’t you proposed marriage yet?”

    Of course, Christian men also need to sexualize conversations to some degree when they are looking for marriage. They don’t need to mouth, “You’re so hot!” like a beta, but they can use some appropriate, low-key negs to sexualize the conversation. Christian men need to learn to engage women on a sexual level in conversation while remaining chaste and also to learn how to take sexuality in conversation more lightly and playfully. Christian men need to learn how to get women used to their touch while courting, keeping everything appropriate.

  30. Oh, yeah, I’m an old married fart and I find that women come on to me all the time. (Yeah, my wedding ring makes my finger swell cuz it’s 1/2 size too small so I don’t wear it.) I’m average height, am overweight (not obese, though), and quite bald. I’m not aware of doing any sexualization myself, but just my confidence and lack of interest in women seems to build attraction. And I simply smile. So, I’m not needy and I’m aloof and confident. I bathe regularly, lol, and groom myself and don’t wear raggedy clothing. Simple stuff. I’m actually pretty nice, so nice guys _can_ generate interest. I get my self in social situations, especially dancing, and the action starts. I take dance lessons and attend weekly/monthly dance parties at dance studios or bars which have a dance floor. If I were single, I’d sexualize conversations with eligible women. It really isn’t that hard to be a nice guy and attract women. At my age, I attract women despite not being overwhelmingly physically attractive and having some facial blemishes due to skin aging. I don’t compliment women on their looks, but I may notice changes or notice things that aren’t changes (which women seem to still find attractive). Recently, a couple of women who were attracted to me are 7’s and I often attract 6’s _all without trying_! I’m near 60 and the women are usually quite a bit younger than I am (say, in their 40’s). Not sure if my situation applies to younger guys, though.

    Play a bit with women conversationally, generate some comfort, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. Make sure that they generate comfort in you and aren’t crazy chicks. Start out just trying to engage women in playful conversation and don’t worry about getting laid.

  31. Jaded says:

    Number 4 (Part 2 of Number 2)
    Have you ever were a Nice Guy who wasn’t good looking either and remained a virgin for decades and then though that if you suddenly turned into a Bad Boy, you’ll lose your virginity and become a man? Well, that’s what all of us Nice Guys think. But the truth is that it works for mostly the good looking nice guys. For the physically unattractive nice guys, this hardly works. As I explained in my previous paragraphs that girls are attracted to a guy based on his looks when she sees him for the first time. This is because that’s the only information that she has about him during that time. What drives her to have sex with the guy is his bad boy appeal.

    Now imagine if a nice guy who wasn’t good looking, turned into a bad boy and became a jerk to girls. Do you think he’ll succeed in losing his virginity? Very few of them will. Why? Let’s say there is a guy who is not good looking, cute or hot. So he will not have the attention of girls towards him because of his looks. That means that the girl is 0% attracted to him. So it means that she doesn’t find him physically attractive. In another way, she sees him as an ugly, unattractive guy who will be an embarrassment to her if she ever got into a relationship or if she was ever seen with him by her friends. And also, he will give her ugly children if they ever had any. So there is no appeal at all from the guy due to him being physically unattractive and also her being shallow.

    So the attractiveness from the girl doesn’t exist towards the nice guy and remains at 0%. And then this is where the nice guys make the mistake of thinking that becoming a bad boy and being a jerk to the girl will get her for him and he’ll finally lose his virginity. So since the nice guy senses a lack of attention and attraction from the girl, he starts being a jerk to her. The problem is, since the initial physical appeal isn’t there from you, then being a jerk to the girl actually works backwards and against you. Because originally the girl was only not attracted to you. But now she hates you. Instead of being a jerk that will manipulate her into being mentally attracted to your bad boy attitude, you have made her angry by your unwelcome jerky ways. If a guy has looks, then it catches the initial attention of the girl (her heart). And then his bad boy attitude attracts the remaining attention from her (her p(_)ssy). But if the guy doesn’t have the looks, then there is no attention gained from the girl (her heart). And then being a bad boy won’t do anything to attract the remaining attention (her p(_)ssy). Instead of making her p(_)ssy wet, it will continue to remain dry.

    When a hot guy (even if he is a nice guy) gets the attention of a girl, then she becomes his slave. And then if he also happens to be a bad boy and is a jerk to her, she will simply accept what he does or how badly her treats and hurts her. But if there is a guy (including a nice guy) who isn’t good looking, then he doesn’t have the attention of the girl at all. She doesn’t become his slave. She isn’t under his power. And then if the guy happens to be a bad boy and is a jerk to her, she won’t accept it and will hate whatever he does to her or how badly he treats or hurts her. She will think of him instead as a weirdo who will make an embarrassing husband to her if she becomes his future wife (the girl) and give her ugly and weird children like him. Her attraction towards the physically unattractive nice guy remains at 0% or even becomes – 100%.

  32. Jaded, we know from empirical evidence that there are unattractive PUAs who are notching large numbers. Your argument is hogwash.

  33. Jaded says:

    @ The Autistic Gamer
    And so, you’ve proven that you’re one of those Mr. Know It Alls. Next you’ll tell me that I’m doing everything wrong.

    The PUAs are guys who are simply getting lucky. They aren’t the ones who truly know the game. Do these PUAs ever reveal about the large number of girls that rejected them? They only talk about their success.

  34. Deansdale says:

    Jaded, no matter how hard you try you can’t invalidate the personal experiences of thousands of people just because you hate us for indiscernible reasons. I myself was a beta once, and I still am to a degree. Looking back to my younger days I now realize what I did wrong in my relationships, and I understand why some girls dumped me back then. I also happen to live in an LTR now so I have the opportunity to test out any damn theory I read, hear or dream up. So I do. And I happen to know for a fact that attraction is not random. How I behave affects how attractive I am. It’s a simple concept a kindergartener might understand with a little luck, I can’t fathom why some grownup guys refuse to wrap their heads around it.

    And I don’t want to seem rude but it’s my blog and I don’t like when people leave their trash around, so please leave constructive, well-thought-out comments from now on or expect some moderation. Endlessly regurgitating omegavirginrevolt’s bullshit excuse of an argument is unnacceptable in these civilized circles.

  35. Jaded says:

    @ Deansdale

    If you think that’s what I’m doing, then go ahead with the moderation. Remove all of my comments, even. I won’t be losing anything from it. There will be others like me coming here in the future.

    But the question is, if you guys are coming up with ways that are working out, then how much have you helped nice guys/nerds/virgins with your little tricks?

    And where did I say anything about hating you? This is just one of those assumptions that you and your buddies have fooled yourselves into thinking about me here and then you think that I am somehow trying to be against you all.

    The problem with people like you is that just because you see and hear a few people succeeding with their tricks and their experiences, you think those are the right ways of succeeding. And then you call it evidence. The reason why I don’t agree with such evidence is because I have seen that there are guys who tried those tricks and then it didn’t work out for them. It even puts them in a worse state than they originally were. Just because those tricks work for a few guys, doesn’t mean it is the right way for a guy to get a girl. Because there are guys who are told to use those tricks, yet they still get rejected. The other thing you need to realize is that, nice guys aren’t the only ones at fault. Girls are at fault too.

    How you behave affects how attractive you are? Too bad it only makes bad boys even more attractive to girls.

    Now since you have read whatever bullshit I have written and reached the end of it, and that it is unacceptable in your little civilized circle, you can go ahead and moderate it. Or even better, remove my comments and block me if you have the option to. After all, why do you continue to keep my comments if they are trash, nonconstructive and not well-thought-out? I’m expecting not some, but full moderation. Let’s say, if you do have the choice of blocking me, and I do get blocked, your boys can then consider me as a troll – simply because I didn’t agree with your personal experiences and chose to speak out for those nice guys who are in the minority and have nothing working in their favor. But in the end, I’m only saying what you said to ‘captain Robert’ a few comments above. So yes, my comments are trash, nonconstructive and not well-thought-out (if it makes you happy), go ahead with the moderation and do remove all of my comments, block me if you have the option to, and then consider me a troll who doesn’t contribute anything good.

  36. @Jaded
    “The PUAs are guys who are simply getting lucky.”

    Consistently lucky. Brilliant, simply brilliant.

  37. Deansdale says:

    This blog is my way of helping other guys, but for it to work those guys have to
    1. realize they need help
    2. have an open mind and a willingness to learn
    3. make an actual, honest attempt at trying what I suggest
    Without these there is nothing I (or anyone else) can do to help them. Of course they could figure it out on their own, but if that would work that easily there would be no need for any dating advice whatsoever.

    Look, if you talk about us like “you and your buddies have fooled yourselves into […]” it’s perfectly clear you don’t like us. No problem, not everybody has to like me, but it’s more classy to be honest about it, and don’t try to pretend that this personal unsympathy does not color your perception of game. You are not objective, you are emotional.

    And the biggest problem: you know fuck about game. Nothing. You keep talking about “‘tricks”. Had you read anything I’ve written you’d know already that I do not advocate “tricks”. What you are so angry against is not game but the haters’ misconceptions and intentional mischaracterisations of it. You don’t understand what we do, how we got here, why we say the things we say. And this is perfectly understandable since you never listen. You just talk, talk and talk without listening to us for a single moment. This makes it really hard to argue against us coherently – that’s why you fail at it. If you think game does not work, fine, but at the very least please try to find out what game is before you condemn it. You are like a funny little guy visiting oil painting forums saying painting oil is silly since it all goes to refineries to be turned into gas anyways.

  38. Jaded says:

    @ Deansdale

    If you truly think that I don’t like you because I’m saying that you are fooling yourself into thinking that I hate you, then it isn’t me who doesn’t like you. It actually is you who thinks that. You’re saying that when I say you’re fooling yourself into believing that I don’t like you, is a sign that I don’t like you, then you have to realize that I said all that after you said that I hate you. And still I don’t hate any of you. You still haven’t provided proof about exactly what I said that states that I hate you.

    The only people I hate are those who accuse nice guys of lacking confidence and then blaming them for their failures. These are people who ignore the fact that girls are shallow. And they also ignore the fact that girls say that they want a nice and caring guy, but they can’t see one when he is right in front of her, and then they go for the bad boys and claim that there are no nice guys. So you’re saying that I haven’t read what what you wrote? But you’re doing the same thing. If you had read ‘Number 3’, you would have clearly known who I hate. I’ll say it again. I hate those who think that all it takes is confidence and a bit of tricks, to get girls. And they accuse nice guys of not having confidence and doing the tricks wrong. Those are the people I hate.

    ‘I think first of all you have to sit down and answer the question of why you can’t get laid. If you come up with an answer like looks, money or culture, you’re wrong. Guys with worse looks and less money than you get laid all the time in every part of the world.’

    ‘If you think long enough about it you can’t avoid reaching a conclusion which is simple and logical but hard to accept: the problem which prevents you from getting laid is in your head.’

    ‘I didn’t seem to have much success with girls but I always thought I was doing things the right way – only the world was somehow “wrong”. It was the “girls’ fault”.’

    ‘You don’t understand what we do, how we got here, why we say the things we say. And this is perfectly understandable since you never listen. You just talk, talk and talk without listening to us for a single moment.’

    Alright, if what you say brings success to nice guys and virgins, then how come there are guys out there who are doing everything that you’re saying, yet they still can’t get laid? They can’t all be doing things wrong. I’ve seen guys who are bad looking, lack money and of different culture. And they didn’t care about any of that. They didn’t let that be a barrier. But they still got rejected and couldn’t get laid. I’ve been thinking for a long time about them. I thought to myself that if these guys were told that it was all in their head, and if they stopped thinking that they were not getting laid because they weren’t good looking, then how come they are still getting rejected? And then I realized that they weren’t the ones at fault. The world is at fault. The girls are at fault too. What you are doing is telling the guys that they are the only ones at fault. And that is what I don’t agree to. Are you saying that girls aren’t attracted to jocks but think that all nerdy guys are attractive in high school? Are you saying that an ugly virgin guy who doesn’t care about his looks, approaches a girl and gets told by her that she doesn’t feel the same way towards him, but then somehow in the next minute she has major feelings for a hot guy who she is willing to have sex with – that none of that is true and it doesn’t exist? That is exactly what I am trying to point out.

    ‘You are like a funny little guy visiting oil painting forums saying painting oil is silly since it all goes to refineries to be turned into gas anyways.’

    And you’re like the guy who tells skinny guys to do this and that type of exercise and their bodies will be packed with muscles in 5 years. When the guys do all those exercises and come back looking hardly changed after 5 years and tell you that it didn’t work, you tell them that it is all in their head that they think they don’t have muscles. And if they truly don’t have muscles, then it is all their fault. You totally ignore the fact the the skinny guys have the ectomorphic body type that doesn’t allow it to become muscular with the usual tricks.

  39. @Jaded
    We see plenty of examples of guys who aren’t particularly good looking getting laid regularly. Ugly guys will always have problems, but not those who are 5+ if they develop conversational skills and some confidence and the proper aloof attitude and some game skills.

    I was good looking as a youth and didn’t have much trouble finding girls to make out with/pet, but I wasn’t into ONS. I also lacked confidence, but I forced myself to approach girls. I had a serious conversational skill deficit, but that didn’t stop me, probably because of my looks and the fact that I paid attention to establishing girls’ comfort with escalation.

    Participation in Couples’ Dancing (like Ballroom or West Coast Swing) will do wonders for confidence and leadership. Guys will need to take group lessons in ballroom dancing. Then, when they have a little skill, they will find that they can approach girls and get them to say “yes” to dancing with the guy. It will massively boost their confidence and minimize their fear of rejection. They will get used to girls saying “yes.”

    Guys will have to learn how to lead and dominate the girl on the dance floor by leading her in the dance. Guys will get used to touching girls and being comfortable touching them. Guys will have opportunities to practice conversation while dancing with girls. Dancing is great exercise and can help guys eliminate excess weight. It’s also more enjoyable than solo exercise for many people. So, ballroom dancing is a very useful “trick” for nice guys.

  40. FinishFirst says:

    Guys you got it all wrong, you can keep beating yourself up for being “a nice guy” or you could just learn that women want a man. You keep saying that “bad boys” or “assholes” get laid and get all the women, but why is that? First it’s because they don’t let women run all over them or bow down to them. women don’t find that attractive. Think of the law of the jungle, a woman is turned on by a man that challenges her, that makes her feel a sense of intrigue. If you guys would just say….Fuck it…I’m done with the nice guy routine, I’m not gonna kiss up to all these women, I’m gonna make the woman be challenged by me, you’d get more chicks. I’m not implying that you have to become a bad boy or asshole but you gotta start being more of a man. Women are not turned on by something similar to how they act, they need to see a man. Or maybe you would like to “just be friends”. Up to you. I’ll be more than just friends and not kiss up to women.

  41. Jaded says:

    @ FinishFirst
    That only works for hot nice guys. The ugly nice guys will have very little achievement if they do or do not let women run all over them. Most women would just walk away if ugly nice guys don’t bow down to them.

    If you are in a desert with nothing around, and then after a while you find a plant with a flower, then it becomes something that you want. The flower is a beautiful object that caught your ‘attention’ and you want it. But if that flower has a fence around it and you can’t approach the plant and get that flower, then it becomes a ‘challenge’. You will make attempts to overcome the barrier (fence) and get the flower.

    Now if you are in the same desert but instead of finding a plant with a flower, you find a shrub with just normal looking leaves that has been fenced. Then it really isn’t something that you want. The shrub isn’t an object that really caught your ‘attention’. Whether there is a fence around the shrub or not, it really isn’t a ‘challenge’ because you aren’t going to approach the shrub. You will make no to very little attempts to overcome the barrier (fence) and get to the shrub.

    So that’s the same with women. If a hot looking nice guy doesn’t let a woman run all over him, then he gets her ‘attention’. Since the guy is hot, he is the beautiful object that caught her ‘attention’. And if she cannot get that beautiful object (hot looking nice guy), then she will make attempts to overcome that ‘challenge’ (barrier) and get him. Why? Because if she doesn’t make attempts in getting him, then she is losing the treasure, which is the beautiful object that caught her ‘attention’.

    Now if the guy turns out to be an ugly looking nice guy, then it really doesn’t matter whether he lets the woman run all over him or not. This is because he doesn’t have her ‘attention’ in the first place. Since the guy is ugly, he isn’t the object that has caught her ‘attention’. So if the ugly looking nice guy hasn’t caught her attention, then he isn’t a ‘challenge’ for the woman at all. So she will make no attempts in overcoming that ‘challenge’. Why? Because if she doesn’t make attempts in getting him, then she isn’t losing any treasure at all, which is the ugly object that never caught her ‘attention’.

  42. Jaded says:

    @ The Autistic Gamer
    Dancing, martial arts and a few other things do allow guys and girls to touch the bodies of each other. But the touching is limited. And so it builds limited confidence in guys. What I am saying is that, dancing/martial arts will allow you to touch the hands, arms, shoulders, hip, legs, face and neck of a girl. A guy will be comfortable in touching those parts of a female. But those are only body parts he will be comfortable with, in touching the female. Once he has no problems in touching a female in those parts, he gets stuck again. This is because those are the only parts of a female that he can touch. He can’t touch her other body parts because the dancing that he is doing, doesn’t require/allow him to touch her other body parts apart from the ones that he is required to touch. So that way, the confidence level of a guy increases to a point and then it stops there. In the end the guy will also realize that even though he is comfortable in touching the female body and has a lot of confidence, he can only succeed in getting laid or even losing his virginity, ‘if’ the girl allows him to. What I am saying is: you can have all the confidence in the world, but if the girl doesn’t let you have sex with her, then you are still left as a virgin.

    You can confidently go to a store, pick a shirt, try it on and get comfortable with it. You go to the owner and get ready to pay him the full amount, but he doesn’t want to sell you the shirt. He replies that he isn’t interested in selling you the shirt. So there isn’t anything you can do to buy the shirt and have it for yourself. You can have all the confidence, but if the store owner doesn’t allow/let you buy and have the shirt, then in the end you are still without a shirt.

    The same applies for guys. They can get totally comfortable with the female body and have all the confidence, but if the girl doesn’t allow/let him have sex with her, then in the end he still can’t get laid and will possibly even remain a virgin.

  43. theasdgamer says:


    Dancing solves the problem of the cold approach. You have an opportunity to talk with a woman and ask her for her phone no. Yeah, you still have to build comfort, instigate, isolate, and escalate, but for guys who have trouble getting the nerve for cold approaches, dancing is great. Eventually you approach groups of girls and ask them if any of them know how to dance and then face down the alpha bitch and take one of her pack to dance with and get to know.

  44. ShuckCorn says:

    Good article. I was a virgin until I was 29… Now I’m almost 30 and I’m trying to turn myself into the fuck-machine women supposedly desire. You know… a confident, bad-boy, muscular, and groomed alpha male. Funny that I have to work hard to turn myself into someone I hate. I guess it will be worth it when I am hate-fucking bitch after bitch. ;-D

  45. Deansdale says:

    I don’t see why anyone should hate being confident, muscular or groomed (that being a funny way of saying you care about your appearance). All this means you’re healthy and take care of yourself. If you want to turn into a bad-boy, or hate-fuck anyone, that’s another question, completely up to your personality.

  46. Lon Spector says:

    I agree with Jaded, but for different reasons. The key is in the Astrological
    chart. When you have a terrible Astrological chart like myself, and I suspect
    Jaded, we have NO CHANCE. That’s why I am a 56 year old virgin, and why I
    want to die so bad I can taste it.

  47. burtyburt says:

    I think every man can get laid very easily if you follow the easy steps:
    1 stop jerking off. If you do you’ll eventually get horny enough to do something about it.
    2 lower your standards. Everybody knows someone who they could probably be having sex with right now, but they’re “too fat” or “too ugly”. Chances are if you start dating this person he or she will improve their looks because of all the affection you are showing.
    3. Be yourself and Respect yourself. She will love you if be yourself, nice guy or bad guy. But most of all stand up for yourself, if she treats you like shit tell her quick to go fuck herself!

  48. Lon Spector says:

    Girls can certainly get “it” if the man is desperate enough.
    I knew a woman who had facial hair B.O., a twisted mouth from an untreated
    stroke-FILTHY, and EVEN she was married!

  49. Brad says:

    Hey I made added some info here just a few minutes back. I think it could be very helpful for a lot of men out there.

    PLEASE, Please do not post my full name! First name is fine and I have no problem with that. Email listed with this post is same as my previous post.
    Thanks much.

  50. Brad says:

    I am putting this out there for those who despair about not getting laid. This should make you feel a lot better about your self. IT COULD BE FAR WORSE THAN YOU COULD POSSIBLE IMAGINE but, never give up, I haven’t’!

    As a reasonably attractive male, I have not been on a date, had a kiss, or sex since the age of 17 years old. No, that’s not typo. . . . .

    All of my live, I have always strived to improve my communication and approach skills. When I was in my 20s and 30s, there were no such things as dating sites, dating coaches, or MeetUp groups. I have been using these now for several years in an attempt to attract a mate or at lease to get a date but, with out any success, so far at least.

    Over the last several years I have read, practiced, re-read, re-read again and again the sources of dating education and tools at the end of this letter and still have no success. I have probably devotes thousands of hours to reseach, reading, and practice in the real world. I have numerous stories I could tell you of my adventures and failures in my life long search, sometimes funny, other times just sad.

    A week ago I tried Speed Dating again and thought I had made really good impressions with 8 of 14 women I met and had fun. I was surprised to learn however, that none of these selected me as a match.

    Last year I saw a psychologist to make sure that I was not mentally ill. She did assist me at becoming more confortable in talking with new people, which I do now with no problem at all. Over all she thought I better ballaced than most of friends and was also amazed that women were not literally chasing me. Shoot, I know enough now to be a professional dating coach.

    Recently I did reach out to a well-known local dating coach, Beth Hopper who has been written about in the Denver Post. I provided her the basic same information that’s I included here. She too was amazed by my efforts and the fact that I was still unsuccessful. She didn’t think that she could provide any help to me in addition to what I have already been learning.

    In my early 20s and a few times in my early 30s, I had considered suicide as an option but, eventually came to the conclusion that God must have some reason for doing this. Lately I have begun to have second thoughts but, still would never go though such a thing, instead I’m just more determined that ever to solve this issue and now spend about all of my 98% of free time to this effort.

    Yesterday, I had my 1st date in 37 years. It went pretty good. Maybe there’s a God after all.
    I’ll try to add good sources of helpful info in my next post.

  51. Brad says:

    I have repeatedly tried to add the sources I mentioned in my last post but, for some reason this blog will not seem to accept any of them, no matter how short I make this list. I will keep trying as it good stuff to know about and can help you as it has me.

  52. Brad says:

    Here is another attempt to list some of the useful information out there that I have used.
    Body Language 101 – David Lambert
    Body Language and Attraction v2.0 – Joanne Fallwater
    Body Language – Dahlia Salvatore
    Date or Soul Mate – Neil Clark Warren
    How to Ace Your First Date – Chelsea Kaplan
    How to Be a Sexy Man – Chase Amante
    How To Convey Confidence To A Woman – Christian Thorne
    How To Get A Girl Friend Dating OnLine- Rober Belland
    How To Instantly Connect With Anyone – Leil Lowndes
    How to Make Girls Chase – Chase Amante
    How to Puck Up Girls – Ricardus Domino
    How to Talk to Women. . .And Get Laid BradDP
    How to Use the Sexual Frame to Turn Women On – Ricardus Domino
    It’s Not You, It’s Biology – Joe Quirk
    Leave A Lasting Impression – LaDawn Black
    Lessons Learned From A Life Spent In Bars – Derek Cajun
    Magic Bullet – Savoy
    Perfect Personality Profiles – Helen Baron
    Secrets Of Sexual Tension – Vin DiCarlo
    Seduce With Style 2.0 Secrets of Men’s Style And Seduction – Vince Lin
    Seduction Science – Derek Vitalio
    Sex Talk – Carole Altman, PhD
    Speed Seduction Patterns By theGuru (Abee)
    The Art of Conversation – Marcia Jedd
    The Men’s Health and Women’s Health Big Book of Sex
    Mystery Method Second Eduction – Author Unknow
    The Art of Seduction – Robert Greene
    The Pickup Artist – Chris Odom
    The TAO of BadAss – Joshua Pellicer
    Secrets Of Speed Seduction – Ross Jeffries

  53. Brad says:

    Also go out to MeetUp groups. There’s lots out there. Go to MeetUp.com and search for Single or Dating in your city.

  54. Brad says:

    Also there a lot of books and videos out there by David DeAngelo and Carlos Xuma that have helped me a lot as well. One of these days, I’ll eventually succeed and get me a girlfriend too. Also, remember those Meetup groups. Some of them are specifically aimed as helping guys like us.

  55. don Fefinho says:

    Allow me a guess: had been raised by a single/divorced mom, eh? Just my speculation, but that would explain a lot.

  56. Brad says:

    Good guess and correct.

  57. James says:

    If your upset being nice hasn’t gotten you laid then you may want to reconsider how ‘nice’ you really are. You may not like the bad guys who game women to get laid but being nice to a woman in an attempt to get laid is the same damned thing just far less effective. A truly nice guy is nice to everyone and expects nothing in return. I consider myself a nice guy but when I’m around an attractive women I absolutely do NOT try to be nice because even for me it really is hard to tell how much is genuine and how much is just an attempt to impress. Besides, attractive ladies get plenty of attention, guys do all sorts of dumb shit to get close so really if your a nice guy your best bet is just to be yourself and try your best to treat her like she is just someone normal. Save the nice act for the less fortunate, for people you are not attracted to, for the elderly, etc…those people are more likely to appreciate it.

  58. Deansdale says:

    “If your upset being nice hasn’t gotten you laid then you may want to reconsider how ‘nice’ you really are.”

    This is bullshit. Boys are taught everywhere that they can win women’s hearts by being nice. No wonder many of them are disappointed when they do what they’ve been told to do and it fails to work every fuckin’ time.

    “A truly nice guy is nice to everyone and expects nothing in return.”

    That’s not a nice guy, that’s Forrest Gump or Jesus Christ. Then again, it is an idiotic notion that nice guys want to “buy sex” with faked niceness. They want to get intimate with someone (which is only natural for everyone) and they try to initiate things the only way they know how: by acting like a decent human being. Nice job shaming them for it.

    You are a decent human being, but being rejected disappoints you? How dare you, you mean bastard!!! Being disappointed means you’re not a decent human being afterall.

  59. James says:

    Hmm, didn’t expect that kind of reaction. But you made my point for me: “Boys are taught everywhere that they can win women’s hearts by being nice.” In other words they are taught how to play women, albeit poorly — that if they alter their behavior a certain way they can get what they want. And that was the point I was trying to make before but I realized while writing this response that no matter what you do it can be seen as a play. Even being nice there are many ways you can approach a girl, many things you can say or do, its all about learning and adapting and experimenting and if that sounds like a game to you well, sorry to say but it kind of is.

    And just for the record I’m in the same damned boat as you guys. I’m severely shy though so most people don’t even realize I’m nice, they think I’m a jerk because I don’t respond to them the way they expect me to. I hate thinking about this like a game but I’m starting to get over it. So where am I at right now: Small talk. Even small talk can be turned into a fucking game but at least it’s a game I’m comfortable playing at the moment. I still suck at it but I’m getting better. The other game I’m comfortable playing: Talking to women with no other purpose then to be rejected — not like a jerk or anything, just as myself but with different expectations and, at first, different targets. And guess what: It was exactly what I needed. I now approach all women with no expectations, just a small hope, and I am not hurt much at all when I am rejected — the way it should have always been.

  60. Jaded says:

    The problem is mostly with those clowns who conned guys into being nice to girls. And now it has spoiled everything. Some guys are born nice, others program themselves at a very young age to become nice to girls. They are told that being nice to a girl will get them that girl. It is their reward – just like in a Disney movie. But when it doesn’t work, those same ‘nice’ guys start thinking about where did they go wrong. They run back to all those old men and women and even their parents, and they tell the nice guys that either they did something wrong while being nice to the girl, the girl must be with some other guy, or there are plenty of other fish in the sea, bullshit. The nice guys approach other girls and the result is the same. And then, some ‘Mr. Know It All’ will show up and tell the guys that they are doing everything wrong. They’ll tell the nice guys to follow what they did and it is guaranteed that they’ll get a girl and lose their virginity. And then when the nice guys try all of those, and still end up where they originally were, the ‘Mr. Know It All’ will take the easy way out and blame the nice guys about not being confident or any other excuse they can come up with.

    So, my point is, the nice guys have been told all the wrong stuff about girls and made to do all the wrong things. It is time to look at all these problems deeper, break it down and then design a game that actually works for nice guys.

    If nothing is done to get nice guys, girls, then guys like Lon Spector will not only end up and die alone, but also end up ending this entire family line and bloodline with him. What if Lon Spector is the last member left in his family with no other members around to continue it? Would any girls (who may be reading this) actually realize this and step up, and say that yes you would like to become his wife and enable him to have children so that his family line can continue instead of it becoming extinct?

  61. Deansdale says:

    “Hmm, didn’t expect that kind of reaction.”

    Nothing personal, I just think that telling nice guys if they want sex they are “fakes” is a form of shaming language. You can be a genuine nice guy and still feel disappointed after a romantic prospect rejects you.

    “they are taught how to play women, albeit poorly”

    That is if you approach the subject in bad faith. Nobody says that if you act like a decent human being panties will fall off instantly. They teach kids to show respect and act nice for the sake of being a good person, and say that’ll make women see you’re a decent guy. Well, that is actually true – what they don’t say is “being decent” means nothing romantically. So, those poor guys don’t want to manipulate women by being nice, they are simply nice. (And feminists shame them for it.)

    “that no matter what you do it can be seen as a play”

    Yep :) Feminists play this card all the time. What you do is utterly irrelevant, you are being manipulative, period. Which is silly. Women are a lot more manipulative than men, it’s simple projection on their part.

    “its all about learning and adapting and experimenting and if that sounds like a game to you well, sorry to say but it kind of is”

    There’s no problem with learning from experience. You’d be stupid not to.

    “I’m in the same damned boat as you guys”

    I had a vague feeling yesterday that you are, but as I said, I don’t like nice guys being vilified. They have enough problems already without others accusing them of being worse than “bad guys”. Your intentions are good, but you seem to have adopted a piece of feminist propaganda :)

  62. Deansdale says:

    “And then when the nice guys try all of those, and still end up where they originally were, the ‘Mr. Know It All’ will take the easy way out and blame the nice guys about not being confident or any other excuse they can come up with.”

    The first step is the hardest one. It’s not an easy way out, it’s the simple truth. Most guys project a really weird vibe at first when they try game, and it shows. When you’re anxious or afraid nothing will get you laid. This is why 90% of newbies fail. I want to help them – this is why I blog(ged) – but it’s never easy regardless of my intentions.

    “What if Lon Spector is the last member left in his family with no other members around to continue it?”

    You can’t expect anyone to bear your children just because you’re antisocial. It is your job as a human being to attract someone from the opposite sex. If you can’t do it, well, tough luck – pay escorts or learn how to do it the hard way. No government agency or private company will assign a wife to you. Your options are limited: 1. prostitution, 2. game, 3. celibacy (and slowly going insane). I advise everyone to go for a combination of the first two – paying for sex first will help you get it for free later.

  63. James says:

    “Your intentions are good, but you seem to have adopted a piece of feminist propaganda :)”

    You are probably right but I never really understood what a feminist was so I like to believe I came to that conclusion on my own :) Its really just the ‘getting laid’ part that bothers me I could get laid if I wanted to but that isn’t my goal. My ex-girlfriend is always willing and it doesn’t happen often but I’ve met some very sexual ladies that I have had to physically push off me because I find that sort of thing to be a huge turn-off.

    I guess that just puts me in a similar boat. I have an ex-girlfriend and I was with her a long time and we have a few kids together. She is the only one I’ve ever slept with though and I’ve only been on 1 date in the past three years since we broke up while she has dated 5 or 6 men and has been engaged twice. Its very frustrating because she is very manipulative and likes to play games (no trouble lying to men at all) while I can barely even get a date because I refuse to be that way.

  64. Oldpuller says:

    What you do is arrange a meetup via a dating site (easiest way), hire an escort a few hours before the date. When the escort has satisfied your needs and you have paid, then go on your first date. Do not shower but use lots of aftershave.

    You will come across as very non-needy indeed. Your date will interpret you as an alpha male who gets a lot, and she will subconsciously smell the other female, proving the point. This will get her competitive and turned on. Use usual pua methods and get her laid.

    Then arrange another date asap via the dating site and continue until you have laid three ladies, don’t worry about looks at this stage.

    Now you have a rotation and are non sexually needy, so now go on dates outside of the three and whever you get one you prefer to the others, dump one of the three and put her into rotation.

    Rinse and repeat.

    Remmeber though, this is a lot of work, you are going to be very busy and tired indeed.

  65. El CApo says:

    hello guys :)
    first sorry for my english …but i have been reading this and i liked some opions…. i wouldnt be reading this if i wasnt looking for some information..or wanting to know things better.
    so i will try to tell about my view about this topic
    im 30 years old guy and handsome and cute ” according to them ” ,and i know also that im ok looking according to me.and i have confidance on myself and i know it .im not virgin but almost cos durning 4 years i only fucked 2 times ..lol,this makes me laugh and makes me cry too
    im a nice guy and gentelman ,sometimes i think onenight things arent good for me ,but of course i want to fuck as much as i can ;) i was looking for a girl that i can have a deep conversation ,date with and stuff like that..i was going to clubs ,trying to talk with girls ,ask for dance or drink and beeing gentel …..all what i get is a NO…
    and sometimes i really hate how girls can be fake..one time i aproched a girl i asked about her name ..and she lied about even her name ,,cos i heared her telling to her freind ,,that Now you have to call me like this …straight when i heard her saying that …i said adios,im a persone that i dont accepte to take any shittt from any bitch even if she has a golden pussy ..anyway
    sometimes i really have the skill of readying the lips and hearing what people talk even in loud music atmosphere,many times when i try to aproche ,i knew that the girl said something bad at me to her freind ,i go quitley near her ear and answer her according how she is rude…
    and its not just in the clubs ,its everywhere ,i try to play the picking up game in malls ,and stuff ,it went same .sometimes when a girl smiles to me i go to talk with her ,by trying to ask her number ,comes the answer NO but i have a boyfreind..this makes me laugh and ask triple quirstions about girls…and now when i go to aproche i knew already that its a NO answer ,,so after all this i decided to stop even talking to girls…
    the funny thing is everytime i go out people says that you gonna get 10 girls tonight this and that …balbla bla..somepeople say that i look angry ..i look like angry antnio banderas..thats what they say..but i really dont smile alot and i dont find it reasonable to smile withoout a reason ,,and i like to go out alone and sometimes just be alone
    im a serious persone and im tired of talking so much bullshit ,again and again to get laid….
    for me i tried hard i guess ,and also i know myself so why we should blame ourselfs about things ,after all these experinces ,i decided that if a bitch doesnt want me once ,i will not want her 1000 time.and i start puting a red cross on all of them ,
    so you pro guys tell me whats wrong ?

  66. northerner says:

    What’s wrong? Why are guys like me still virgins? How about every women you ever wanted to be with ultimately tell you ‘you’re not my type’ times a thousand. How discouraging is that, tell me how much confidence is crushed within you when year after year it’s the same response? Non-stop repeated rejection. I’m 35 years old and it’s still the same story. To all the guys in their late teens, early twenties who are all upset about not being able to get laid just wait until you reach your 30s and still haven’t been able to have your first time. It’s going to hurt much worse, it’s going to feel like life is not worth living anymore and you’ll be so distracted by never getting any that you won’t have the same passion for your career, hobbies, and friends you once did in the past.

  67. theasdgamer says:

    “im a nice guy and gentelman ”

    Nice guys aren’t attractive to women in clubs. Same with gentlemen. I was dancing with a woman and she wanted to “slow dance.” She proceeded to rub her tits against my chest. This is the modern woman. She is sexual and feral. Especially women in clubs. Women think about sex almost as much as men do.

    Don’t be a nice guy or gentleman if you want sex. Even if you’re religious, you need to sexualize early. Let women know that you are attracted to them sexually. You can get that message across by asking them to go on a walk and trying to hold hands. If they don’t even want to hold hands, forget them. Don’t get stuck on any one woman. Move on if they aren’t interested.

    Last time I was in a club, I asked ten women to dance and they all rejected me. Eventually one said “Ok” and after that lots of women wanted to dance with me. Women with hawt guys were looking my way. Getting rejected and continuing to approach shows that you are a high value man. The more you are rejected, the more women see your value. Crazy, but that’s how they think.

  68. voices echo from the past says:

    The movie the 40-Year Old Virgin has opened up an awkward can of worms that no one wants to deal with. The internet was flooded with forums where people could write anonymously without the fear of being exposed as that creepy 30-year old guy living in his parents basement because he was badly misguided by the public educational system. Forced to sacrifice friends to make better grades, he went to a college to get a degree that didn’t amount to anything when the economy collapsed. Now he’s financially ruined working his life away at a minimum wage job if he’s lucky trying to pay off those college loans while his youth is pining away. Now society is all politically corrected and under a heavy surveillanced martial law or police state control that hinders and smears away his manhood even more. He can’t even talk to a girl anymore without feeling dread that she’ll call the cops and label him a sex offender just because he’s lonely and wants to meet women.

    Now all he has left is the internet plaguing his conscience with all these websites trying to guess why a man in his 30’s would still be a virgin. We have a society that has shunned away a certain category of men who didn’t deserve it. And no one out there is sincere about helping, even those self-help coaches who are desperately hoping he’ll buy their book. No one is serious about facing up to this problem, and it is a problem. And it’s not going to go away.

  69. Hynos says:

    I think Robert is right on point. I have been called a nice guy millions of times. I have been called a shithead another million of times. But generally I’m a nice person. Do I get laid? Yes, I do. Why? Because chicks love confident, sexy, smart, talented and beautiful guys. Just another, I saw a couple on a bus. A chick was 9.5 out of 10 and the guy… well, he was what I would call a null guy. He had completely nothing. He was quite good looking, but not model like. He dressed as a pot head: dark jeans, a jacket, shoes that leave no impression at all, good unstylish haircut. And probably a no theater or television contender by any means. Well, unless they need a simple good looking guy. And there was I. Stylish, beautiful, charming guy, just standing there, going on a bus, and she gave me such a look! Omg, I thought that I haven’t felt that sweet inside throughout the whole year. I mean she was probably the sweetest/beautifullest chick I saw this year. And yeah today I saw a girl who really hot and she didn’t pay much attention to me cuz I was all tired and looked not that good in a daylight, and she was seriously hot and I got nothing. But then again, if I was rocking my beautiful shoes and a blazer, all looking overly happy and cofident, she would probably was going mad over me… Anyway, what I’m trying to say is… If you’re born very beautiful, have wonderful sense of aesthethics and are ultra smart, you can have chicks that are ultra hot! But then again, do you want to fuck someone who you don’t respect, that’s a good question to start. I mean the problem is, it’s hard to find a ultra hot chick with a sick sense of style, better than model looks and figure, and to actually engage in meaningful conversations and actually feel strongly connected with her. I’m basically am single, and I fucked a girl like 2 months ago, and I’m not even willing to try impressing some airhead hottie. I’m kinda gonna work on my projects and look what happens. I seriously don’t feel much attraction to stupid/ugly girls, those 4-6es. And those that I want – 9s and 10s with an attitude, blue blood, talents, intelectuallity, inteligence, the right kind of set of beliefs, well I’m not really sure they exist. Because logically thinking, that’s who I should be after afterall. Oh, and I wish my chick had an amazing singing voice, so we could do a duet, that would be amazing. And yeah, with that set of requirments I kinda have to lover my expectations on the facial structure, but I DON’T WANT TO. I want the best and I want it now. Do it you fucking land worms. I am your lord and you are my slaves, wahahahahahaha

  70. Hynos says:

    voices echo from the past>>>>>
    Those kiddos could get help from some gestalt specialist. That shit is pretty good.

  71. inrare form says:

    All women want me, they just don’t know it yet. Even the married ones too. Oh by the way, The Silence of the Lambs is the best movie of all time.

  72. because you need respect your religion.sex not every thing important is respect religion no sex before marriage .end of story

  73. Lonely Person says:

    I think about suicide all the time, I know how pathetic I will always be, I have nothing interesting to offer to a woman, I cant live in a world where everything is about looks. Why would a girl want to be with me when she can get someone more better. Why should I even exist when I fail at everything, and every one will be laughing at this.

  74. Zorg says:

    Lots of masochists. If you’re really just a clinical masochist (moaning on and on about how useless you are, should die, etc) so people can tell you “no you’re not!” So you can then insist you are, then you really have 2 options:

    1) seek out help through therapy because you need it

    2) embrace it and find a sadist to humiliate you, cuckold you, whatever and enjoy what you can

    You can see from the posts that there is a HUGE difference between the classic “40 year old virgin who can’t get laid” and the “kill me now I’m useless” and the “I hate all women im going to buy a remote ranch with a pit” types…

    The latter two really need psychiatric help. Blogs like this are for that first guy. And yes, if you’re short, fat and ugly with bad skin and all the wrong places, fuck yeah it’s going to be a lot harder and you’ll fail 99% of the time (ask me how I know!) but you can only control what’s in your power to control (within reason and your comfort level and means), and that’s attitude, grooming, eating habits, etc. In other words as bad as you may be, at least make the best of what you’ve got. Poster boy for this? Danny fucking Trejo.

  75. Omad says:

    I’m a nice guy and will not change. If I become the bad boy trust me that bitch is getting chopped up the moment she pisses me off. There is a reason good made me a nice guy.

    So fuck all you bad boys because your all truely pussies inside, hiding behind closed doors.

    Nice guys finish last in bed yes. Bad boys finish in 1-2 minutes…

    Today because women are so mentally fucked up I now give them death stares when they look at me. I don’t know why maybe because I hate them because off how they think. Complicated mind fuckers they are. Well I’ll tell ya not having to deal with them is great. Fucking them is great but then u gotta deal with them.

    I scare woman off these days like I look at them like I’m gonna eat there face off, like I do to blokes that wanna look at me. I don’t give a fuck about them any longer.

    Treat women the way you treat a dickhead bloke that thinks his top shit. Just don’t knock her out, won’t get laid.

    Or if u are a guy like me a nice guy, look for the innocent down to earth girl. There is too many fake women these days.

    Bad boys go with the fake bitches
    Nice guys go with keepers

  76. Omad says:

    And too all the idiot crying alpha male. There is no such thing as an alpha male in humanity it only works in the instinctive world… Stop leading people astray and into depression thinking that they are lower than they are. I’d put a machete through any dickhead that stood over someone implying they are better than someone.

  77. Deansdale says:

    “I scare woman off these days like I look at them like I’m gonna eat there face off”

    You look like the next Elliot Rodger, it’s only natural you don’t understand what game actually is.

  78. Jaded says:

    To anyone who might be wondering if I am going to reply to any comments you made to my comment, then the answer is no. I am not going to reply to you or even comment on this page anymore. The reasons are numerous. But the main reason is that I am being trolled by some of the most trusted people here. The other reason is that, even after stating the facts about what I and others go through, still clowns continue to argue with me, accusing me of doing things wrong, and me generalizing everything.

    One of the last reasons I’m not going to comment here is because it is a waste of effort. By that what I mean is that, even after I have stated the type of future a guy will have (no children – end of bloodline) and how serious it is, I am still being told it is the fault of that guy for not being able to attract a female. Well, I’ll tell you something. When a person is out at sea, drowning, you don’t tell the person that it is his own fault and that he should learn to swim if he wants to stay alive. Instead you should be the one who should inform others about the drowning person, or even, you take out your boat and rescue him. Why? Because it doesn’t matter if a person knows how to swim or not, or if he/she is a great swimmer. When the current is strong and pushing him away from land and actually preventing him from reaching the land, then it isn’t his fault at all. And, it should be you or someone else who has to realize all this and go and rescue that person instead of saying that it is his fault for not being able to swim to the land. It is a 50-50 thing. The guy drowning at sea tried his best but he didn’t succeed, now it is you who should make an effort, go out to sea and save that person. That person can’t be blamed for being at fault.

    And that’s the same that applies to those guys who are single and are in danger of never being with a female and eventually dying with no children, and ending their entire bloodline. Why? Because some of those guys truly don’t have the skill of communicating or even dealing with females. They naturally don’t have such skills. And when those guys aren’t able to get a girl, a female should realize this and come to the rescue. Telling the guy that it is his own fault for not having the skills to attract females, being in a location where there are very little females available and all of them have been taken, or even lacking confidence, is something that only cowards will do. These are people who are only good at accusing the victims, but they are never interested in finding out what’s the cause of such problems. It is a 50-50 thing. If the guy with naturally no skill of attracting females tries his best but still fails, then a female should realize all this and come for the guy. There is nothing wrong in this. Why? Because while the female is standing back and not approaching the guy and instead saving her pride, and other ‘Mr. Know It Alls’ are accusing the guy for being at fault for not being able to attract females, there is something called his bloodline, that is dying.

    Obviously majority of the idiots on this page wouldn’t get this but still continue to tell me all of their bullshit. You clowns are just too focused on blaming the guy instead of realizing that there is a greater danger. That is, the bloodline. The bloodline is something, that once it ends, it will never ever come back.

    And just because some of you clowns did this and that and got the girl, that doesn’t mean that doing this and that will work for every guy out there.

    I’m not going to come back here. So stop accusing me of generalizing, stop arguing with me, stop telling me all this bullshit about doing this and that will get a guy the girl, and stop trolling. I’m not going to return here to read any of that and you’ll be wasting your time. What you should work on instead, is to increase your level of intelligence and realize that there are guys in this world with numerous problems and difficulties, who are in different types on locations, with no to a lot of females available around him. And that, what works for you or someone else in getting a female, won’t always work for other men. Grow up!

  79. will says:

    It’s shit like these advice articles why we hate women, us guys who can’t get laid. See, imagine what these kind of advice would look for a woman trying to get laid. They would say “just let the guy try whatever to pick you up and just say yes if you want to”. That’s disgusting. Men need to do all this shit to get laid but women just need to say YES and that’s it. It’s fucking disgusting. Every single person I talk to, I treat them the same. I’m always the same guy. I don’t change for anyone. I like myself. However, not a single woman has ever claimed to like me. Well, FUCK them. It’s their loss, not mine. I don’t care if I die never having tasted a vagina. They will all die not having tasted my dick. Fuck you too.

  80. |robert says:

    What a great blog. I have learned that women are cunts. You date, date date, you improve yourself, you force yourself into positivity, you build your self esteem with gym and work and whatever. Yet if you have ‘the stigma’ you’re simply not good enough. Rejection, rejection, rejectinon.

    Next time I see that old lady standing in the bus, you know what I’ll do? I’ll imagine her 40 years younger NOT sucking my dick and nicely stay seated. Why the fuck would I get up for some old cunt who never did anything for me?

  81. Deansdale says:

    If you learned that women are cunts it wasn’t from my articles. I suggest you look up Whistler’s post on reddit about the 5 stages of the red pill. Well, to make it easier, here it is:

  82. robert says:

    Those 5 stages are a lot of nonsense if you can’t get past stage 3. Listen man I’ve put literally over 2000 hours in ‘improving’ myself as well as actually interacting with 100’s of women, dating about 85. Couldn’t get laid. So what nonsense are you talking about with those 5 worthless steps? It’s not about ‘good’ looking the way we men see it: the skin, the symmetry etc. It’s about “manly” looking, which some guys can do just well with a beer belly and a face that looks like an ass. But if you just happen to have a nerdy body, a too hight voice, short etc. combined with maybe an introvert personality that can only PLAY to be that extravert outgoing guy the whole 5-step plan just falls down. I’ve used dating sites (and plenty of them) and things turned when I tried photo’s of normal guys. Yeah, well that’s not going to help though when they really need to meet you. And yes I’ve hired a professional photographer for my photo’s.

    It’s just a load of crap.

  83. curious_guy says:

    @author of blog

    I have read this blog and many of the comments and I find it truly interesting.
    In my life, I have met many guys that I would consider as a “bad boy” or rather a dickhead, and one thing that I found about them was that they were very opinionated and were firm to their opinions. On top of that they didn’t take bullshit either in general.

    Correct me if I am wrong, but based on what I have read so far, I can conclude that what you are trying to say is that I should make the utmost effort to not accept other people’s behaviors or opinions, if it contradicts my core beliefs and values, just to get their approval and to be so-called “liked by them”. By just acting like an agreeable person all the time shows that I have no character and a possible “push-over” or mentally weak person that is afraid to disagree, contradict, debate, or face down another person’s behavior or opinion for fear of getting their disapproval.

    I guess in simple terms, you are saying “not taking any bullshit” behavior means having self-respect by asserting your core belief’s and opinions even if it means it may get another person’s disapproval.

    In a way, living in this way, might mean that you may make more enemies. But at the same time this will make it possible to get the respect of more women that may lead to getting laid??

    Here’s what I think, that may get a woman to look my way, that may lead to the golden egg.
    1) Maintain proper hygiene, and wear decent clothing that is somewhat fashionable. Smelling good may also be a bonus by wearing cologne. Non-dandruffed clean looking haircut.

    2) Having a job: It would give you an air of more independence, reliability and responsibility as well as financially dependable. (Especially if you are over 30 years of age)
    ** I suppose it doesn’t have to be a job, but something that you are doing whether its going to school or volunteering or whatever, to show you are not a bum.

    3) Take no bull-shit attitude:
    – You will hold to your beliefs and values and assert it if it is contradicted. For example, If I’m in a group with a chic that I like and there’s a guy who’s this know-it-all or a dickhead, and makes an opinion either towards a certain topic or towards me or another person in the group, that I don’t agree with, I would contradict his opinion by asserting my side of the argument and stand my ground. Is this the no bull-shit attitude?
    – You will not let any hot woman or any dickhead make you say or do what you normally would not do for a person or what you don’t want to do.

    4) Be straightforward with the woman and what you want:
    – For example, I am on a bus and I see a girl that I like. I would go up to her and say hi to her and tell her “I really find you sexy and attractive and I want to exchange contact info with you” or “I find you to be really attractive and I was wondering if you want to exchange contact info with me?”
    Instead of trying to casually talk to her or try to come up with a line that indirectly allows me to talk to her more normally.
    – After getting her contact info, I would ask her about her life and what she does and I would always bear in mind to keep on the no bull-shit attitude so if she were to say something that I don’t agree with, then I would assert my opinion, even if it might result in her feeling turned off by me. Also I would freely talk about sex and about what I truly feel about a relationship even though it may make me sound like an immoral dickhead myself. Is this what you mean by the no bull-shit attitude?
    – If a hot girl smiles at you, there is nothing wrong with smiling back right, since naturally you like talking to her? Later doing the conversation, I don’t have to agree with what she says and I should assert my opinion even if it means she feels put down by it right? Since there is no point in playing the “push-over please like me” behavior since that is a turn down on its own?

    In truth, there is not point discussing moral values and principles, because in the end, we are all selfish inside and we want what we want instinctively, And we also have a desire to get rid of anything that stands in the way of us getting what we want. I acknowledge myself that I am sometimes a hyprocrite in what I say and what I truly feel inside and act.

    I can go on further but I will stop here until I get some feedback.

  84. Deansdale says:

    Well, basically yes. I could argue about some smaller details but fuck it, the more viewpoints are added the easier it is for newbies to grasp the basics.

  85. curious_guy says:

    If you have any smaller details to argue about please mention it since it might be an eye opener for me. Its great getting feedback from the more experienced.

  86. Hard case says:

    Well I’m a hard case this way. Out on my own after 25 years in a sexless marriage where I did all the right things supposedly. So here I am, 48, single, classic tall dark and handsome, own my own successful company, wealthy, confident public speaker and conversationalist, have written a novel, won major awards for my NGO as a community leader, etc… But in 10 months of being single do you think I can get laid (which if I am honest with myself is one of motivators for conquering the world)? No. Absolutely no way. And although I find your feminism rant a bit immature there is something to it. I have always been focused on helping people and trying to empower them, but in my own way am quite disempowered. High moral standards, the thought of walking through fire for your woman, romance. I’m not really willing to let go of these things to play a cheap numbers game. It seems undignified. But then again it would be nice to be able sleep at night (from a purely biological perspective).

  87. northerner says:

    Tell me, what would you say to a 35 year old virgin who still lives with his parents because he’s very poor and can’t financially survive on his own? Does that mean he automatically looses out on any opportunity at all to ever have sex?

  88. Deansdale says:

    There are even poorer people in the world having sex all the time. It’s not easy for everyone, but it’s not impossible either. Go out there and start making connections.

  89. Nvisible says:

    Women want to be approached by guys they are already interested in. If she isn’t showing interest, flipping her hair or some other preening gesture, maintaining eye contact with you, going out of her way to be in proximity to you . . . you aren’t the one. Women want to be pursued by the guy who can get any girl he wants, but he’s chosen only her. If you aren’t THAT guy, she doesn’t want to deal with you expressing interest. She doesn’t want to shame you, but it’s a PITA for her to have to deal with your feelings.
    Only 15% of the guys in the sexual market place, get to be one of THOSE guys. One of the strongest turn ons for women is to be desired to the point that the guy is almost out of control. What they leave out of that statement, is that she wants to be uncontrollably desired by the hot guy who’s picture she can find on MCM. These are the guys women have been dreaming of since junior high. These are the guys Disney has been promising them would be slaying dragons for access to their vagina. She’s wants to be approached by THAT guy. Instead, one of the other 85% has shown up, and is essentially trying to sell her something (himself) that is so far below the image she’s held in her mind since she was a little girl, she can’t double clutch enough and downshift past that many gears in one shot. It’s not about “settling.” There is a freaking chasm in her mind between “settle” and where she sees the lower 85%. To her “settle” is a rich 8 instead of a rich 9.5. You can hate that all you want, but that’s the way it is. Women get to choose, and at minimum 80% of guys are invisible to them. You can’t hate them for it. Their expectations are the result of lifelong conditioning.
    Live your life for yourself. Be the best you can be for YOURSELF, and if you’re lucky some woman may see those qualities in you and respect it and want to know more about you. But you do that with the full knowledge and acceptance that your life choices (like being a gamer or being a respectful/caring guy) may exclude you from the sexual market place. Buying tricks on line (boot camps/pick up lines) just makes you circus dog performing for treats from a master who will see you as just that; a dog jumping through a hoop.

  90. Dan says:

    My 2 cents.
    looks must matter to women a lot.Try making a few fake dating site profiles.Experiment with the guys picture.It soon becomes obvious looks are a huge player.Using my own photographs it is utterly impossible to attract any interest on a dating site.Perhaps one response per month.Simply changing the face picture to a good looking friend caused my reply rate to jump 30 fold! If I had his looks, you would easily find a partner within weeks at the most.Compare that to not even finding a decent respondent within a human lifetime using my own face……
    As far as in the real world,offline,I see evidence that ugly guys have it vastly more difficult than good looking guys.Many of the tricks that the BEST pick up artists promote simply dont work for shit, and considering the financial incentive to convince ugly,ordinary men they can have georgeous women, I take any advice from pick up and dating gurus with a pinch of salt.Not to say their is no merit to any of their advice,but dont treat it as gospel.
    For example, many times I have heard that the very best way to attract women is to ignore them,and they will start hitting on you! Some of the most successful pick up guys promote this idea. Yet I completely ignored women for literally 20 years,and I mean didn’t even look at them at all, due to not being interested in having a relationship or sex,yet never did I Have women coming on to me.So much for that technique……..
    Other times I felt quite convinced I was totally cool, calm and collected around women.Not nervous at all.Yet Im sure I could sense what I can only describe as repulsion, I would even go so far as hatred, from attractive women.
    I have plenty of social sucess with guys,heaps of friends, always well respected by male peers, yet not aware of any women ever having had interest in me.Perhaps a couple that were like 4s in terms of quality.
    I really dont know for sure.But it really does seem a lot like looks are the culprit at times……

  91. Deansdale says:

    “ugly guys have it vastly more difficult than good looking guys”

    That much is obvious and nobody would deny that. Still, even if you look worse than average you can get laid with the right mindset. The ugliest guy in the world has 8 kids:

    Others play on easy while you’re stuck on hard mode, sure, but that only means you have to put in some extra effort. That might not be ‘fair’ but you can deal with it.

  92. Dan says:

    Of course you can get laid, but not necessarily with someone you find particularly attractive,or even remotely appealing sexually.some people are not fussy and physical appearance of the ir partner does not have overbearing effect on their sexual compulsions.I personally would not feel any particular urge to have sex with anyone who was below a 7 in looks.I would literally sooner jerk off than have sex with a 5,even though I am probably a 5 in looks myself.Only 30% of the population is even attractive enough for me to bother having sex with.Of those,at least 80% will be already partnered at any given time,the remaining 20% will have 70% of the population chasing them,all having been told they are in with a shot for those 20% which are attractive singles.
    You can start to see that the numbers are NOT very encouraging for guys who plan to punch above their weight,so to speak..

  93. Deansdale says:

    “I would literally sooner jerk off than have sex with a 5,even though I am probably a 5 in looks myself.”

    Well, it’s your choice then, you should be able to live with the consequences :) If you only want hot babes but you don’t have the fame or the wealth to pull that off your only reliable option is escorts. Game can add a point or two to your SMV but it’s not a magic pill.

  94. Dan says:

    So what RSD and the like promote is in fact false hope.An ordinary looking person cannot in fact use game to pull 9s and 10s,as suggested by the PUA community?
    And yes, it is my choice to avoid sexual relations which are essentially of no value to me.The whole point of having sex is that it is hot,erotic and enjoyable.Having sex with average people is none of these things.Imagining having sex with someone you find attractive is more value to me than having sex with someone you don’t find attractive.So its kind of a choice,but at the same time, it is the only sensible choice for me.Their is nothing to gain by making any other choice.

  95. Dan says:

    But I guess a 5 like me could get a 7 lookswise,which I could maybe settle for.Its just a peculiarity of mine that I only become aroused by very specific things lookswise.I could try settle for someone who looks like me, just that I would never get sexually aroused by them.I figured sexual arousal is kind of a prerequisite for sex……

  96. Deansdale says:

    If anyone promises guaranteed hot babes it’s bullshit. For some lucky guys it might happen once in a decade if the stars align properly, but most of the times the effort is just wasted. I approach this topic with a long term relationship in mind, and I think it’s better to have an LTR with a cute 7 who has an adorable personality than to hunt for the elusive 10 for a one night stand, even if it eventually happens. If a guy wants sex with a 10 that badly I would really advise him to find an escort, it does carry a social stigma of sorts but the sex can be fantastic regardless. Do it discreetly and it can be a life altering experience in a positive sense.
    If you don’t want an LTR and have nothing better to do you can go out looking for hot babes – you’ll probably get lucky one day, you just have to be persistent. One thing is for absolutely sure though: you have a much better chance with game than without it. If you aim high you need all the help you can get, so you better learn all there is to learn. PUA stuff helps even if it can’t guarantee miracles – it’s rare for a hot babe to hook up with a guy with an SMV of 7 but it’s still more likely than her hooking up with a 5…

  97. I love pussy…I could suck on it and fuck it all day long…it’s the cunt they’re attached to I have difficulties even being in the same room as a hypocritical two faced female human being. If sucking penis wasn’t so disgusting to me, I’d wish I was queer. These women all seem to fall for the guy with the best line of crap, then they whine & bitch about how much of an asshole Mr. F>N. Perfect turned into…he was that before you sucked his dick sweetie, you just bought his line of crap, so who’s the fool? Women want easy sex just as bad as men, but hate to be deemed as slutty, so they play Miss Goody Two Shoes so they don’t appear desperate and whory…I’ve seen this all my life.

  98. PartlyOkayGuy says:

    Hmm, I never considered myself as a nice guy and very rarely do I get someone totell me that I’m a good guy and neither am I a douchebag. Never have I had sexual experience nor had a girl attracted to me(or at least not that I know of), though the girl I was close with and attracted to during highschool was actually giving me the greenlight(for us to date; she’s the secretly conservative type and sex wasn’t really what I was after) but I was too colorblind then and a bit dumb.
    More to the point I actually want to make, I agree to your main point about “it’s-in-the-head” kind of thing. Just recently have I realized that, and only less recently have I actually unconsciously gotten out of that mindset.(recently = about 5-6 mnths ago;less recently=about 8-9 months ago) I started to see what I did ‘wrong’ and what I didn’t see because of my wrong/blurry perception.

    My advice to other guys would be below and I tell you I swallowed the bitter pill that is my own advice and that I am speaking mostly out of experience and partly from my observation.
    One of the key points is to realize your self-worth and another is to actually admit it to yourself mentally and verbally(or in concrete ways). Without doing those you might fall into self pity or world hating mode or some other shit that will progressively make your life miserable, which like a quicksand the deeper you get into the harder to get out of and the harder to scrub it off ya. So get out the muck promptly, asap, etc. and from there on it would be your call what the next order of business would be.
    The above may not be the case, however, and the opposite may be case. Regarding that I can’t really say anything cause it’s not within my experience.
    Note to some guys, I actually want people to make less generalizations and be more open minded, I have a friend who’s a real nice guy and have girls fawning over him, it might be because he has good looks but something’s telling me that isn’t the case(what i’m trying to say is that the nice guy doesn’t always finish last and that it’s more of how you carry yourself and how you look at the world)
    Disclaimer: above things are my just my belief, opinions and observations, if you disagree then fine, it would actually help if you give another viewpoint which I may read so that I may know where I went bollocks. Oh and yeah if you didn’t understand a thing just dismiss all of these as incoherent babbling of a complete moronic idiot.

  99. Alex001 says:

    Fuck everything. I hate my life, I hate women… fuck it all to hell.

  100. bill boobies says:

    I was a virgin until I was nearly 24. Women want to be dominated, disrespected and all around treated like shite. Thats what they secretly crave. They don’t care what you look like or what kind of job you have unless you know how to treat them. They are shittier half of humanity. When I took this to heart, I got laid within a year and have never been single for more than a month or two since.

  101. mike says:

    Im 41 years old. I will be 42 soon. Never had a gf ever in my life. Been on 3 dates in my entire adut life that happened just by pure luck. The only time I touch or talk to women is at the strip club. My mind at thi point is fucked so bad from what I have gone thu that I feel the only solution is to new aig for death. I listen to music all day just to escape the pain. What crazy is I am good looking dress better than 90% of all men out there. Women look at me all the time and I know they are interested but I dong socilize with them for fear of being judged. All you guys that are young that na re going thu this , everyone is telling u be patient things will be ok your still young. Well things may not be ok. I hate to break the news to u but if you are shy socially akward have anxiety issues group up without father you have no friends or numerous other issues then unless you step out od your comfort zone and do something drastic there is high probabilty u will end up all lone thoughout your life. No girl will ever come knocking at your door to save u. And your friends are as lost as u are and the guys that have gf cant help u because they are trying to hold on to what gi they have so they dont get up lonely. So in essence everyone is desperate scared of being loney or is lonely and selfish with their issues. Everyones life is a big mess. If u cant approach women and communicate we to them and make them like u and want to be wit u u will be alone I dont care how rich or hot u are. Here is the cold hard truth about women living in the 21st centurt. Women today are selfih cold hearted unresponsive disturbed confused people who dont know what they want and they will only date guy because he can do something for her. She is not with u because she lov vees u she doesnt love u sh love what u can do for her. If u cant do anything for her then there is no reason for her to date u. So this means money, status, fame, good looks, humor, nice car, good sex, o or anything that she deems profitabe for her. Let me say it again women dont give a SHIT about u. That is why u nice guy suffer and that is why bad boya do well. Misery loves company. Every wome has a bitch in her which means deep down in her core she is rotten and due to that reason you cannot genuinely love her. You cannot give love to someone who has no lov vew in them. And th e majoity of women today lack love in their heart. That is why u guys are suffering. Please email mme at waterriches@outlook.com. thanks mike.

  102. jeff says:

    What’s a 37-year old virgin guy supposed to do who still can’t get laid? I get all emotional when I think about this, because in the state I live, there are NO escort services available because it’s illegal. Do I shrivel up and die a virgin because no one would even look at me back in high school and college? I feel so lost and lonely, even though I have a job, there are many days when I don’t feel like living anymore.

  103. Deansdale says:

    Move to another state, or better yet, to another country. Start a new life somewhere you’re viewed as a better relationship prospect. I know this sounds excessive but what other options do you have?

  104. Hassan says:

    I ended up on this blog because of sheer frustration and looking for an answer to this problem, i.e, why have I failed to get a woman in my life. Well to be more accurate I was engaged to a girl last year who I met online. This was however through a dating site geared for my culture/religion and specifically for marriage. She was the first (and so far only) girl I ever had a relationship with in my 36 years of existence. I met many girls before this but kept getting bluntly and mercilessly rejected.

    Our engagement did not last 3 months. This particular girl was desperate to get married for her own ulterior motives and she eventually revealed to me that she had met tons of guys before me and pretty much decided to settle for me via an online marriage matchmaking site. She made me feel like a consolation prize and she herself wasn’t that attractive (a 6/10). She made sure to make those 3 months a living hell for me as she had a short temper and her demands on me were endless. I stopped talking to people at work and became very depressed (even more so than when I was single). 1 week before the wedding I had to make a decision and decided to call it off with her. This was after she made me buy her jewellery, restaurants and an expensive honeymoon. I lost a lot of money on these materialistic demands of hers and remained a virgin (again for culture/religion reasons), so I got nothing. In fact I lost money and emotional and mental health. I am angry to this day that this happened to me. I have given women so much and they have given me nothing but shit and piss in return.

    Frustrated that after years of effort and loss I remained a virgin. I started to look up escort services and only then I realized how lacking in confidence I was with women sexually. I had to see escorts 5 times and only on the fifth time I was finally able to lose my virginity to one literally only a month ago. However, escorts are too expensive and I can’t afford them on a regular basis.

    Guys, the point I’m trying to make is that women do not appreciate what us men go through, they don’t care and are truly heartless and judgemental. I don’t want to hate women, I don’t want to hate anybody, but after my experiences how do you expect me to feel towards them? Why are women so harsh, cold-blooded and cruel?

    If we complain about these terrible experiences you accuse us of hating the world and being entitled. If we do nothing then you will accuse us of being cowards and you start complaining about where all the good men are. What is it exactly you want us to do? I really wish women would read these comments and respond to them with real life solutions.

    Further to all of this I have been getting advice from PUAs for years and tried my best to put what they teach into practice. I got nothing out of these PUAs except for more rejections. I actually spent a good amount of money on a few PUAs and lost even more hard-earned money that way (a fella from the UK called Johnny Berba who has now threatened to press charges on me with the police just because I left negative feedback on public forums about his program and asked for my money back)

    I just want answers without having to go through the same old useless generic advice from PUAs. I want real life solutions. I turn to the Internet for answers and I always end up on a PUA website or blog.
    What exactly is meant when you say go out there and get a life and meet women? What does that mean, please elaborate? What do you mean be confident? I was a very confident young man before I started to look for girls, but after non stop rejection I just don’t know what is meant by confidence any more?

    I am a busy man and have a career to look after so I figured online dating is a convenient way to find a girl, as in theory the women are also looking for a relationship, our objectives should be mutual. I have expanded my horizons to outside my culture and yet I continue to just get completely ignored. I’m not ugly, I keep healthy and take care of my appearance, I make sure to look confident and content in my photos, yet I get 0 responses on the online dating sites. So I figured ok… lets put a fake picture on my profile of a white guy with the typical bad boy image, i.e. tattoos, leather jacket, cigarette and looking like a moody thug who will beat people up. How many matches do I get? 60 in less than 2 weeks. I shit you not.

    How do you expect me to feel about women and PUAs now?

  105. Deansdale says:

    Look, I never asked for money and never advised anyone to pay for lessons or books from PUAs. You can hate anyone for all I care, it has nothing to do with me.

    As for your situation, I can’t do anything else than to repeat what is in the article: the problem is in your head. Your thought patterns, your habits, and maybe even your religion, are preventing you from building a relationship. It’s understandable if you’re desperate but that makes you unattractive to women, so you need to defeat your own defeatism first. I know it’s fuckin’ hard and it gets harder every day but many men have faced this problem and most succeeded in overcoming it, so there’s probably hope for you too.

    To be honest you’re probably fucked because of your religion. This modern age is very tough on guys who are looking for young women to marry. You probably have a decision to make: either to loosen your religious restrictions a bit, or to bear your suffering with your head held high. At the moment you look like someone who decided to hop on one leg in a running contest and complains that he can’t win. You decided to play on “very hard” and it’s obviously above your capabilities, so the best option would be to lower the difficulty setting even if it hurts your religious pride.

    If I were you I’d start off by hiring escorts discreetly to get rid of the sexual part of the anxiety and then look for a simple relationship that includes sex without even hinting at marriage. These are steps towards having a marriage later, steps that can’t be skipped easily. After having experienced an LTR you could start looking for a woman to marry with a greater chance of success.

  106. Jaded says:

    @ Deansdale

    This is exactly the reason why I don’t post here anymore. The problem isn’t that the guys who come here, aren’t doing things right. They are doing things right. Majority of them are. The problem is you. Your type of guys just don’t want to listen or accept what other guys are honestly telling you and somehow, according to you, they are the ones always at fault. Somehow they are the ones doing everything wrong. What you don’t want to accept is that (something that I have been saying from the beginning) – no matter what you do, how much you ‘improve’ yourself, how much you change yourself, how much you become something that makes it obvious to everyone that you’re someone that any female will want, but still, if a female (or females) isn’t interested and doesn’t want you, you can’t get her, no matter what you do or try. However, what has happened is that, 99% of the females have become like that, and that is why guys can’t get girls anymore. It is like that ‘Guy, Shopkeeper and The Shirt’ story. You’re a guy who wants to buy a shirt, I am the store owner who is selling the shirt you want. But, if I don’t want to sell it to you, then I won’t and you can’t have it. No matter what you try, how much money you offer, how poor and needy you prove yourself to be, how generous and nice you are. If I am not interested and I simply don’t want you to have that shirt, then I won’t let you have it and you can’t get it. No amount of advice from any PUA that you contact and use, will convince me at all. Yet, in place of you if there is another guy, and if I WANT TO sell the shirt to him, then I simply will. It doesn’t matter whether the guy is rich or poor, how nice or rude he is, what race or religion he is, or whether after getting the shirt from me he’ll turn it into a rag. If I want to sell him the shirt and let him have it, then I will. Even if the guy has no money at all, if I simply want him to have the shirt, then I WILL let him have it, regardless of the fact that there is you who is prepared to offer me $1M for it and then you’ll preserve the shirt after that in your home. It is that simple. Females are the same as the store owner and the shirt. If they don’t want you to get them, then no matter what you do and how hard you work at making yourself appeal to them or even convince them, they will not give themselves to you and you can’t have them. While at the same time, those same females will offer themselves to the guy they want, no matter what he’s like. This is the reason why you see guys getting no response or interest from females on dating sites, yet as soon as a picture of a Bad Boy is placed on the profile, females start responding. It shouldn’t be us guys to change ourselves from the way we are if there is nothing wrong with us. Changing ourselves would mean that we aren’t being ourselves. Changing ourselves also means that we aren’t what we naturally and truly are. You’ll always hear females tell guys to ‘be yourself’. So why even change yourself when it is about ‘being yourself’? Just because you got a girl for yourself, that doesn’t mean that other guys will also get girls if they follow your way.

  107. Deansdale says:

    You seem to misunderstand reality itself on a very basic level. You have an idealistic image of how the world should be, and if reality fails to work that way you think reality is at fault. This is the worldview of an utopianist.

    If you’re doing things right or not is measured by your success, nothing else. Doing things right is the same thing as being successful. If you’re not successful it should be fucking obvious you’re not doing things right. You sit on this horse bass ackwards.

    Women are what women are, you can’t change that. The only thing you can change is yourself. Millions of men find suitable partners, which makes it obvious that it can be done. It’s not impossible. If you can’t succeed it’s not the world’s fault, it’s not women’s fault – it is something in your head. It’s not your looks, it’s not your money, it’s something you think or say or do. But you intentionally refuse to understand this because it would make your worldview obsolete, it would mean that your emotional sacrifices to maintain your own ideals were wrongheaded.

    You are the perfectest example of what this article is about – you cling to your ideals despite them fucking you in the ass. You insist you’re doing the right thing and your lack of success is the world’s fault. Well guess what, the world will not change to accomodate you, so you have two options: be celibate with your ideals intact or adapt to the world and get some success for the price of correcting the stupid utopianism you think is an integral part of your personality now. It’s not a part of you, it’s just something you think, and it can be changed. Thinking that you’d rather die than let go of your idealism won’t make you a martyr, it will make you a celibate idiot.

  108. Jaded says:

    @ Deansdale

    You need to read what I wrote again.

    Like I said, men who come here have been constantly changing themselves over and over trying to see if they can get it right and get the girl. But, no matter what they do and how much they change themselves, how much they think that it is all in their head, they just can’t get any woman. Yet at the same time, another guy turns up and he does nothing at all, the same women just hands herself over to him without even trying to know who he is. You can ask this to the guys who turn up here. They’ll tell you the same thing. These are guys who have been blamed for far too long for something that isn’t even their fault. These guys have done their share of the work and now it is time for the females to do their share. After all, it is a 50 – 50 thing. When one side has done 50% while the other side does 0%, then it doesn’t work. Neither can one side do more than 50% of the work. Men can change themselves all they want, but if the women don’t respond in the manner that is suitable, then nothing will happen. You wouldn’t have succeeded either if the female you’re with, didn’t respond to anything you did. You would have been like all of us. You simply became lucky. So it is like that customer and the storekeeper. You can tell the customer that it is all in his head. But if the storekeeper just doesn’t sell the shirt to the guy, then no matter what he tries, he still can’t buy the shirt. There is nothing about being successful simply because you did everything right. I mean, I can beat up a girl, marry her forcefully, and forcefully have children with her. In the end I succeeded because I got the girl for myself. Does that mean that I did everything right? There have been guys who got girls simply because they had the looks. These are guys who never even paid attention to their appearance or decided to do something right about themselves, yet they succeeded. And like I said, you just don’t want to accept that there is more than one side of the issue going on here. Instead you continue to blame the guys about it all being in their head and that they’re at fault. If it was all about being in their head, then don’t you think that by now thousands of guys would have worked on it and succeeded? Don’t you think that they would have overcome that? I’m talking about guys who let go of their past life that they though was preventing them from getting girls. They were totally changed guys. Yet still, they never got any girls at all. Even guys like you who were ‘helping’ them, sat confused thinking why those guys weren’t getting girls even after they did everything ‘right’? And when those same guys (guys like you) were questioned about how is it that their methods (it is all in your head) are failing, they just couldn’t answer anything at all. ‘It is all in your head’ is just a myth. There is more to it than just that. Ask any guy who has followed your theory yet still failed. They’ll tell you that it just doesn’t work.

  109. Deansdale says:

    “no matter what they do and how much they change themselves, they just can’t get any woman”
    I can’t fathom where you got this bullshit. You just keep repeating sheer nonsense like this, and it’s getting quite boring now.

    “another guy turns up and he does nothing at all, the same women just hands herself over to him”
    Yeah, but it’s not a mystery why this happens – the other guy does something differently. That’s it. For fuck’s sake, the ugliest man in the world has 8 children from 2 different wives. Stop this idiotic whining about how getting laid is impossible.
    And he’s not rich by any standard. I fuckin’ bet he just turns up and women hand themselves to him, right? If he can get laid anyone can, if they just stop the fuckin’ whining for a fuckin’ second, for the love of god

    “These are guys who have been blamed for far too long”
    It’s not “blaming” you assclown, nobody gives a flying fuck about retarded notions like “blame”. It’s a very simple concept: if your ideas about something are incorrect you should change them. You don’t have to feel shame or guilt because your ideas were false, you just have to correct them and move on to a more successful life. On the other hand blaming women or the world will get you absolutely nothing, it just proves you’re a cretin who clings to falsehoods and blames others for his own failures.

    “These guys have done their share of the work”
    Your words prove you don’t have the slightest idea of what that “work” should be. You think being nice or having cash should be enough to attract women and you blame women when this doesn’t work. This is retarded. Anyone with the brain of a chick pea should realize that first you should research what women find attractive and then work towards that. But noooooo, it’s better to whine about how your wrongheaded attempts didn’t work.

    “After all, it is a 50 – 50 thing.”
    I see feminist bullshit rotted your brain. The world doesn’t give a crap about ideological utopianism, like how you think it should be “a 50-50 thing”. It simply isn’t, and the sooner you realize this the sooner you’ll get laid. It’s screaming obvious you don’t have the first clue about how women or relationships work, yet you come here discouraging others from trying to learn things and understanding the truth. Fuckin’ idiot.

    I won’t continue addressing your bullshit, come back when you have realized how clueless you are. For an unsuccessful person to try telling how it is to a successful one requires gigantic levels of ignorance and hubris. Maybe if people like you would be humble enough to listen and learn instead of yapping about your inane ideas constantly you’d have fewer problems in your lives.

  110. Ben Weiser says:

    Most of these “nice guy” clowns really have no idea what it means to be a nice guy. As a matter of fact, many are probably the opposite of nice guys. Here’s a fact that’ll blow your mind, women actually like nice guys. However, many men who can’t get laid believe that their “niceness” is the problem. However, most of these men are actually quite manipulative and narcissistic. Nice guys often believe that through certain gestures, or because they feel a certain way a woman owes them some sort of sexual reciprocation. Not only is this a dysfunctional covert contract, it’s flat out abusive. Nice guys often pretend to be friends or actively show a lack of sexual disinterest as a sign of “respect” towards a woman and then feel like they are owed something for treating her like a “lady”. Nice guys often believe that women don’t like sex as much as men and that you have to employ specific tactics and tricks to get a woman to sleep with you. They like to blame women, society, or other men who are “bad boys” for their failure in mating, but none of these elements are really at fault. When you continually fail to get laid with woman after woman or reject woman after woman the problem is not them, it’s you.

    A true nice guy is honest about his intentions. He doesn’t hide the fact that he is romantically interested in a woman instead he is steadfast and unapologetic in his intentions. He trusts the woman he’s interested in is a functioning and capable adult that is able to meet her own needs and determine what is and is not acceptable in a relationship to her. He doesn’t pretend to be her friend to “respect” her more, when in reality he wants to sleep with her. A true nice guy acts out of pure generosity and the desire to please others. If he buys a woman a gift it’s not because he expects her to give him anything in return, it’s because he derives a deep sense of satisfaction from seeing her happy. Many of the “nice guys” in this thread who can’t get laid are the antithesis of this. They carry so much toxic baggage, objectifying beliefs about woman, and delusions about themselves that they sabotage every attempt they have at intimacy and are too frightened to look inwards.

  111. Deansdale says:

    You have a strange idea about what a nice guy is, ie. you seem to think that any man who’s shy around women is a manipulative asshat. Most men consider themselves to be decent people, which they are, but they’re afraid to be open about their romantic intentions and they’re far too afraid to be unapologetic about anything. This doesn’t make them manipulative or feeling entitled to anything, it just means they’re shy. The majority of men, namely the hordes of beta males, are “nice guys”, and 99% of them are actually good people – the narcissistic lunatics you’re talking about are the remaining ~1%. This picture is distorted in people’s heads because actual nice guys are practically invisible and nobody cares about them, social media only ever cares about the exceptions to the rule.
    A guy who’s honest and unapologetic about his intentions is not a “nice guy” by any means, he’s an alpha male. He can be a decent fellow of course but he certainly does not fit the stereotype of the nice guy.

  112. Cody says:

    You see, that is your problem OP, if you want to live a promiscuous lifestyle, no one is going to stop you. I would rather be seen as a good man by women than be in all their pants. You will not be able to keep a relationship, and if sex is what you want then go bang prostitutes.

    As for me, if women wish to take a “challenging” man over a man who shows his affection, then so be it. That is not my problem, and it is none of my business.

    I respect your opinion but do not agree with it, no offense. You can bang all the women you want, it weeds out the whores and leaves me with a better chance of finding a true woman.


  113. Deansdale says:

    You confuse learning what women want in a man with being promiscuous. As I’ve said many times, game is a tool you can use for many things, including keeping your partner happy in a long term relationship. It’s especially important in a marriage because it lessens the chances of your wife wanting a divorce.

    In fact knowing what women want would immensely help you to find, attract and keep your “true woman”. Refusing to learn on the other hand will not benefit you in any way, it’s just a misunderstood mindset of a fake martyr that if women don’t like you as your ignorant self then be it, you’ll be alone and wait forever for the miracle woman who loves you precisely because you’re not attractive. I wonder if you’d do that in any other part of life, like if you wanted to play doubles tennis but nobody would team up with you because you’re a shitty player would you steadfastly refuse to practice to improve yourself and wait for a “true tennis player” who would want to team up with you precisely because you’re a shitty player? That would be astronomically stupid, wouldn’t it?

  114. Barry says:

    Escorts are a good solution, and can help avoid suicide. I’ve been using escorts since I was 24, I sprang for the porn star experience and it was great. However I’m now 33, been through over a dozen hookers. Anymore I just save the money and masterbate. Maybe I’ll save up for a RealDoll. Waiting on virtual reality giddily. Anything beats real females.

  115. Lon Spector says:

    I hope the aurthor of this blog has finally come to see that there are a few hopeless cases.
    But thankfully they are just a few.
    Some of us are too frightened to commit suicide all at once. We opt for the drawn out method.
    Now please excuse me. I must play “Some Guys Have All The Luck, for the tenth millionth time.

  116. I'm back says:

    100% spot on circlebill..

    I have been there.. The curse of the nice guy. It’s a conundrum.. It’s is self esteem and worrying what they think of you.. The second you feel good about yourself and don’t care what they think about you one bit.. . It’s like flipping a switch.. I did it and instantly had a girl hit on me for the first time in years. Just think to yourself, you don’t give a f#vk and just talk to her like a friend. Your golden.

    Yes if your too nice or give more than one complement your done..

  117. Lon Spector says:

    “Don’t you know about the “New Fashion” honey? All ya need are looks and a whole lot of
    From the song “It’s Still Rock’In Roll To Me.” by Billy Joel.

  118. abcdefg says:

    I used to be able to get laid no problem but I don’t know what happened to me and I’ve been in a slump for several years and I’ve been rejected multiple times and I don’t know what to do anymore. I need help

  119. Lon Spector says:

    What you’ve had before can be recovered. Some have never had it to begin with.

  120. abcdefg says:

    I know you’re right Lon Spector. I already feel like this slump is ending.
    Thank you for the kind words.

  121. Trevor says:

    I got laid a few times back in my teens and it was fun especially the time the Baptist preacher’s daughter asked me to give her a ride home, then asked me to carry her bookbag in the house. As soon as we got inside she locked the door of the parsonage and started pulling my clothes off. Her parents were on a mission trip and she had the place to herself for a month. I shagged a few coeds in college and have banged several chicks at work that kept hitting on me constantly (two of whom were married) but honestly sex with women is WAAAY over rated. The majority of American women these days are overweight by the time they hit 25 and by their mid 30s they are well on their way to being morbidly obese especially if they have had a couple of kids. The online dating sites are literally full of these divorced or single moms who call themselves BBWs which translates to “I look like Jabba the Hut and my ex husband or my baby daddy dumped my fat ass and I need some schmuck to support me and the kids”. NO THANKS! Then if you meet a gal that is doable there is always the risk that you might knock her up and be on the hook for 18 years of child support. That happened to a buddy of mine when he was in his mid 30s. At my age (44) I am probably too damn old and set in my ways to live with a woman anyway. I also don’t want any kids because if I had one now I would be hitting retirement age about the time the kid would starting college. I wouldn’t turn down a nice piece of ass if some hot chick or a MILF offered it up but I am can’t be bothered with pursuing them anymore. I would rather just put on some good porn and rub one out instead of playing their head games. MGTOW here!

  122. Dean Walker says:

    If all else fails: There is a medication called cyproterone acetate, aka Androcur. It very effectively reduces libido. I can go without sex and still enjoy other things in life. It feels good to not need them anymore.

  123. Lon Spector says:

    It goes against the natural order of things not to procreate. And you can go to your
    death saying you’ve had it. Those of us who will never have it are allowed ocassional
    regrets even though everything ultimately is vanity.

  124. Dean Walker says:

    Lon, that’s BS. Lots of couples have a good sex life after the man gets a vasectomy and/or after the woman gets a hysterectomy.

  125. Lon Spector says:

    HISTORICALLY, sex has been linked with procreation. Usually, it ends in children.
    I don’t think anyone who’s done reasonably well with women can understand True Enforced
    I’ve read blogs written by cocky upstarts that say sex is just a matter of attitude and self
    improvement. And it’s true there’s always SOME room for improvement. But there ARE
    such things as “Forever Alone,” people.
    Every time a blog like this gets written, the blogger gets swamped by posts by guys that
    DO point out that some people will never have girlfriends for a whole host of reasons.
    It’s easy for a man with a full belly to dismiss starvation, and what years of starvation does
    to a person’s mental state. Why can people accept the obvious solution? Why are they so
    afraid to die?

  126. Dean Walker says:

    I have lived for my entire adult life without a day giong by without wishing I were dead; that was due to sexual deprivation … and also due to never being able to mention it without being denigrated and put in the same category as sexual psychopaths.

    Have any of you considered taking Acdrodur? Have any of you been in touch with prostitutes’ organizations?

  127. Lon Spector says:

    Nawh, no whores for me. A taste of honey is worse then none at all.

  128. Dean Walker says:

    I wasn’t talking about whores. I was talking about a way to no longer need women, in order to feel all right.

  129. Lon Spector says:

    What would communication with prostitutes do for an incel?
    Wouldn’t they only feel further bated?
    If an omega men have sexual urges, they are going to have to resign themselves to
    “crying on the inside.”
    To quote Rod Steward: “Some guys have all the luck. Some guys have all the pain. Some
    guys get all the breaks. Some guys do nothing but complain.”

  130. northerner says:

    We are on the brink of a gender war between men and women. If I am wrong, then I have been truly banished and exiled from the opposite sex. I am forever imprisoned on a perpetual plane of ice and snow frozen far below 0 degrees. The whole world is long dead and torn away from me.

  131. Paul says:

    Deansdale, thanks for this thoughtful article – I appreciate the fact that you are open that you’re still a bit beta like most of the guys reading/posting here. Congrats on your LTR as well – unfortunately some of us will never get anywhere near that. I have never asked any woman out on a date nor told any woman I’ve been attracted to how I feel because rejection is always guaranteed. No woman has ever given me any signals whatsoever that she might see me as anything other than a platonic friend – and I have many of those. Due to this, I’ve never kissed a woman and never had sex (I’m 49). Some guys would pay for sex – I won’t do that because I couldn’t expect any human being to have sex with someone as grotesque as me. Do you have any advice for those of us who will never – literally can never – attract any woman and so really are permanently and forever alone?

  132. Deansdale says:

    If you’re able bodied but consider yourself ugly enough that no woman would ever give you the light of day then you need a psychologist/psychiatrist, and when your self confidence issues are mostly solved try looking for a dating coach.

    If by being grotesque you mean to have an actual deformity, man, that’s tough, and I don’t have any advice that would make that a whole lot easier. Especially if you’ve already lived most of your life without intimacy. I’d say guys with such unfortunate circumstances have a tough choice to make if they don’t want to suffer endlessly: either have themselves castrated (preferably while they’re young), or look for prostitutes who accept clients like that. There are lots of women who have weird fetishes or are openminded enough for such a thing. There are women out there who have sex with animals, midgets, homeless people and whatever, if you look hard enough you will find some who will accept you. I’m not familiar with, erhm, “specialist” communities that deal in such things but I reckon there are some out there, probably in large cities.

    Thing is, it’s a really tough situation at 49. If you succeed you might fall into depression realizing you could’ve done it earlier. If you’re tough enough psychically to deal with that I would say go for it, but if you’re afraid of the consequences you should probably stick to whatever you were doing this far.

  133. Lon Spector says:

    I am 59. The only thing you can do is accquaint yourself with the work of Vernon Howard.
    Google his recordings. Also, “The New Life Foundation” carries on his work.
    You will probably never have sex with another person, but that doesn’t mean you can’t
    uncover your authentic self.

  134. Lon Spector says:

    It’s obvious that merely getting laid is NOT the answer. Any terrorist or mass murderer can
    get “laid.” Many do.

  135. Losey McLoser says:

    Indeed the problem is not getting laid. I’ve had around a dozen hookers; without feeling something for that person, it’s purely masturbatory.

    No the problem is society and women. If you can’t meet her through friends and aren’t photogenic.. your pretty much SOL. Society has made it so that approaching women even in bars is considered creepy now. And online dating only works if you have attractive pictures. Yes folks the data is in(google it), profiles mean next to nothing, women don’t look beyond the picture.

  136. Dean Walker says:

    Deansdale, what kind of castration are you talking about? The cyperterone acetate I took is often referred to as chemical castration. Having one’s testicles removed wouldn’t do as well, because the adrenals and other glands can make the testosterone that the endochrine system calls for; but what I took stops testosterone production. And my penis looks just like any other man’s flaccid penis. So, let’s say that castration can be accomplished without physically mutilating oneself.

    In some of your posts you recommend psychiatry. But psychiatrists will prescribe neuroleptic medications (some alteration of a neurotransmitter) that are far from harmless. Prozac has been found to often cause violent behavior and suicidal tendencies. And other neuroleptics, in their TV advertisements, admit to side effects such as “involuntary muscle movements that can become permanent”. And I have heard of a medication that can cause compulsive gambling in some who never previously had that problem. Yet the Androcur I took is prohibited here in the USA. Fortunately I am close to the Mexican border; and that opens up ways of getting it.

  137. Lon Spector says:

    The Lord God said there were three kinds of euichs:
    1) One’s that were BORN that way. (Birth defects. There were no surgical options in Christ’s
    2) People who were castrated by other men. (For punishments and “utality.”) Hundreds of
    boys were castrated in the Middle Ages so they’d have high pitched voices to sing in chiors.
    Also, in the Muslim world eunichs were used to guard the herems of the sultans.
    In India, eunichs were magician/beggers. They’re dying out now.
    3) People who make THEMSELVES eunichs so they can devote themselves to spiritual studies
    unhindered by sexual urges. The Bible says: “For the sake of the Kingdom Of Heaven.”
    Things like this can’t be done in today’s America. Sex is considered a right. A possesion.
    But like any other material object. There will be “haves” and “have not’s.”
    Since the world is NOT going to change, we have to change our response to the world or
    commit suicide. There’s no way around it.

  138. Deansdale says:

    @Dean Walker: I’m not in favor of psychiatric medication. When I suggest visiting a shrink I mean talking to someone who can help with self confidence problems. I wouldn’t suggest this in general, but if an able-bodied person is over 30 and never even kissed anyone that’s probably a self confidence problem a PUA instructor won’t be able to fix.
    Castration is even more serious, obviously, and I would only recommend that to men already contemplating suicide. If you haven’t lost all hope yet, by all means, try to salvage the situation. I’m not familiar with the available methods – if someone makes this decision he should definitely talk to a doctor and not random strangers on the internet.

  139. Deansdale says:

    Guys, since XMas is here, be a little more positive please.

  140. It is too fucken difficult to understand the complexities of the mind of the human female. You don’t really ever know what’s what, or if you spoke too softly. It’s like playing the frustration game to the nth degree.

    The best relationships I’ve known have been with prostitutes. Over the years I’ve known several, and we built relationships. I knew one for three years. She came once a month, and then she left (Emphasis on “left”). Sometimes she would accompany me somewhere if I needed to bring a female. She always got paid, and once again, she always left.

    Any romantic tales or notions about male-female bonding or souls-mating SCC (sugar coated crap) should be tossed into the trash bin where they have always belonged.

    Wake up boys, the game is about power. You need to have the upper hand or you’ll just be her puppy dog. If you’re comfortable with that, so be it. You have to understand that it isn’t a love affair, it is a war. A war between you and her. My view is traditionally men always feel better on top.

  141. Dean Walker says:

    a little bit more positive: A few women on other blogs have expressed an interest in incel men. And one who has established a presence on the Internet is Emma the Emo.

    The girlfriend I now have was previously married to an abusive man who fathered her children. I, being autistic, had a very messy home and often have to be reminded to wash myself and change my clothes. She takes that in stride, because she considers me far preferable to the abusive husband she had before.

    After her husband died, she was depressed about the prospect of being one of those old ladies sitting on the porch. And then I came along and gave her an attractive alternative.

    Couldn’t a blog like this one draw in a few women who are sick of the alpha males that abuse them?

  142. Johnny says:

    This is what we’ve come to, having to worry about bullshit like this. Myself included. Life is truly meaningless.

  143. Lon Spector says:

    Yep. Everything is twisted around backwards.

  144. John says:

    Wow, I see discussions that have lasted for years on here. In all honesty, you guys have made me want to f***ing kill myself with this amount of depression. There I was having a nice day. And to see some 59 year olds here? Bloody hell. Might as well ready the rope. Here we go bois.

  145. Arthur says:

    Some of us will never be able to attract a woman – so paying for sex is our only way of getting laid. I’m 37 and have never had a girlfriend or sex – or even been kissed – because I don’t want to pay for it. No woman could ever want me, so I never ask women out because rejection is always guaranteed.

  146. Dean Walker says:

    Of all the ways of dealing with this problem, the most desirable way would be to get women interested in a discussion of how to deal with our idiosyncrasies — and get them to see that this would be easier than putting up with the abusive jerks that they’re accustomed to competing for.

    My girlfriend, for one, has to often remind me to change my clothes and clean up and do the other things I should. But evidently she considers this infinitely better than putting up with the husband she had before.

    What about contacting Emma The Emo and getting her to come to this blog and tell her story about the man she’s now with?

  147. Lon Spector says:

    It’s YOUR blog. Why don’t YOU do it?

  148. Dean Walker says:

    Lon, it isn’t my blog? I’m just another participant — just like you.

  149. Dean Walker says:

    I see so many here who bemoan the fact that no woman is attracted to them. And some say that they want to die because of their inability to attract. Why are none of you interested in taking Androcur, as I did? I’m not saying that it’s free of side effects. But it will relieve your suffering and leave you free to enjoy the things other than sex that life has to offer.

    You feel so liberated, one you experience a perceptible reduction of your libido. You’ll notice that a rejection no longer destroys your self-esteem. How can you not want that?

  150. Lon Spector says:

    There should be a better understanding of physical verses emotional dependency.
    Some people are saying that ALL addictions are psychological addictions.
    For example, is the male virgin upset because of a chemical urge for sex, or is the cause more
    mental? There are many gurus who get along perfectly fine WITHOUT sex, or barely give it a
    second thought. Could there be a way of viewing lack of sex as not all that tragic? Aren’t there
    enough people on earth already? In third world countries sex isn’t even given a second thought.
    Daily survival is. Maybe the only problem we have is OUR OWN BELIEF that it is a problem.

  151. Dean Walker says:

    I noticed what Lon Spector said:
    Could there be a way of viewing lack of sex as not all that tragic?

    For me there was, once that damn libido was reduced. So let’s get the FDA to lift that ban on Androcur.

    In Europe and other parts of the world where Androcur is permitted, either over the counter or on prescription, how do the male suicide rates compare with the American male suicide rates?

  152. Lon Spector says:

    Scandinavia has very liberal attitudes on suicide. People don’t discourage suicide even for
    depression. Everyone wants to experience the “good” death. Maybe, if we could offer people
    the prospect of a “comfortable death, they wouldn’t so desperately try to avoid it.
    People have said they wish incels would die and have advocated putting them to death. Many
    incels wish they had the courage to do themselves in. There should be some service offered
    to assist incels to their own deaths. Not out of hatred or spite, but out of mercy and pain allievation.

  153. Dean Walker says:

    So there are liberal attitudes in Scandanavia. So why is there no service available, to assist in one’s own death? If anyone who offers such service would be punished for it, then the “liberal attitudes” are just from the teeth out.

  154. Anonymous says:

    I’m sick of hearing dudes wanting to kill themselves over this. You don’t deserve to die for this. You need to realize a lot of these sluts aren’t out of your league but the other way around. Remember women deserve to be treated like shit so act accordingly and if she rejects you it’s her lose because her biological clock is ticking and after she’s wrapped her lips around enough dicks she’ll eventually wrap it around a shotgun barrel so remember that.

  155. Dean Walker says:

    What the dudes want to kill themselves over is not getting any sexual release. Having high libido and no sexual release causes real suffering. Don’t try to tell them that their suffering isn’t real.

    I have, in some of my posts here, talked about a way to do something about that high libido. Why they continue wanting to kill themselves when relief is available is beyond me.

  156. Lon Spector says:

    But there’s tremendous jealousy about how unfair it is that other’s are getting what is
    seemingly out of reach for them.
    They reason they feel cheated is because they have an accquired idenity (ego).
    If there’s no “YOU,” who is there to get cheated?

  157. Dean Walker says:

    The jealousy I feel now is nothing, compared to what it was when I had high libido. Perhaps those with high libido and a matching partner can’t have some of the things I have — like the ability to concentrate and develop interesting computer programs.

    How many people are jealous of the BMW that Elliot Rodgers had?

  158. Lon Spector says:

    God gave us everything we really need, as long as our basic material needs are met.
    It is the ego that wants a specific happiness. We just need to be alive. NOT sex.

  159. Dean Walker says:

    Lon Spector, on April 8 2014 you said: we have NO CHANCE. That’s why I am a 56 year old virgin, and why I want to die so bad I can taste it.

    In your more recent posts you keep saying that one can do without sex and be happy, if he puts his mind to it. What brought about this change in you? I have admitted that it took Androcur to make this change in me.

  160. Lon Spector says:

    I was feeling “moody” that day. Down in the dumps. No one should harp on how miserable
    they are. There’s ALWAYS someone who has it worse.
    I am a number 4 on the Enneagram. They are called “The Tragic Romantic.” I dream of the
    perfect love, and the BLISS it can give you.
    See “Imaginary Lovers,” by Atlanta Rythem Section, or “One Of A Kind Love Affair,” by
    the Spinners.
    I DO put beautiful women on peadastles. See, “She’s So High Above Me,” by Tal Baucman,
    or most any Toto song like “99” “Hold The Line,” or “Roseanna.
    When it comes to matters of romance, I was short changed. Live with it or die.

  161. anonymous says:

    Never mention the scumbag Elliot Rodger. He makes us look bad. We just need to focus on ourselves and be the best version of ourselves we can be. My previous comment isn’t overlooking the pain of going without sex, trust me I live it everyday but as I’ve focused more on myself things have been changing. I’ve been single for almost 5 years now and I’m only now making a breakthrough again.

  162. Lon Spector says:

    More power to you!
    But alas, for me there IS NO HOPE.
    I love the song, “Make It Easy On Yourself,” by Jerry Butler.

  163. Dean Walker says:

    On reddit, the whole subreddit /r/incel has been expunged, because the people on it were advocating rape. I know how they feel. They see themselves as chained to a whipping post with sadists making fun of them. And they are confronted with the fact that any attempt to talk about their problems and suffering, will only bring more punishment — punishment in the form of being shunned socially and in the job market. It isn’t just Elliot who makes us look bad. Look at how the guys vented on reddit /r/incel ! We need to make the public aware that incel is a social problem that can and should be addressed.

    Androcur is one way in which the problem can be addressed. In Canada and Europe where it is available on prescription, are the doctors willing to prescribe it? In Mexico it’s available over the counter without prescription. Here in USA it’s prohibited; but being close to the border, I could get it. Given the drug cartel violence and kidnapping, I usually paid people to go over there and get it for me. I hope we can get the FDA to change their regulations and permit Androcur!

    We could, perhaps, talk to the feminist groups about how Androcur (or generic equivalents like Siterone or Cyprostat) would take the unattractive men off their backs. In the 1970s, one young women (obviously a hippie) told me: “It isn’t the pigs [police] who hassle me. It’s the dirty old men.”
    So, the women would be interested in a way to get the unattractive men off their backs without interfering with their enjoyment of the men they are attracted to.

    Given the probable side effects, It would be well to consider alternatives. Have some of you here been to prostitutes? or sexual surrogates? One man on the autism blogs said that he could get service from “window girls” in Antwerp for one-third of what they charge others. But he didn’t say how he did it. How do you behave when with a prostitute? Are there things you can do to make them more comfortable with you? And does that result in your being given a rebate? or in your getting better service? What are some of the things they do that make you feel that you have been well served? And what are some things they do that make you feel used and taken advantage of?

    In this day of diseases and propaganda that paints you as an exploiter of abused women, pros aren’t exactly a perfect solution. Maybe we can work with prostitutes’ organizations?

    What about sex substitutes like realdolls and porn? or paid phone sex?

  164. Lon Spector says:

    I make use of escoterics. It’s a form of altered viewing of life without drugs.
    It’s like Eastern religions. Buddhism, which says DESIRE is the cause of misery. Or Taoism,
    that says “One should go with the flow.”
    I don’t imagine I can “reform” other people, or make them behave in ways that would make ME
    happy. Acceptance will make you much more happy. As far as “urges” are concerned, they are
    simply “crosses” one has to bear. Happiness is fleeting, and we must accept the fact that we
    are poised on the razor’s edge of losing everything. Google the song, “Dust In The Wind,” by

  165. Dean Walker says:

    I noticed what you said, that urges are crosses that one has to bear. Most people, including me, don’t want to bear crosses.

    Just yesterday you repeated what yous said on April 8,.2014 “For me there is NO HOPE” … And in another post yesterday you talked about putting beautiful women on pedestals because of the bliss they can give you. Although they can, you complain about the fact that they don’t want to.

  166. Lon Spector says:

    My inate personality traits are of the Highly Sensative Person. The INFJ on the Myers-Briggs.
    Also, my Astrological chart. These are my inclinations. One doesn’t have to be a total victim of
    them. It’s kind of like a double edged sword. The sensative person can be more appreciative
    of beauty when he sees it. The sensative person is going to experience many highs and lows.
    I meant there would be no hope that I would experience physical love. But I can appreciate
    OTHER things.

  167. Anonymous says:

    There’s hope for every guy here. I’m going through this same problem but it’s ending. I encourage every guy here to get on Tinder immediately.

    Also, once you break out of the slump you can have no mercy with females. Treat them as absolute shit and have no remorse.

  168. Dean Walker says:

    Do you have any luck with the women, treating them like shit?

  169. anonymous says:

    Sure do. Every guy here is a king and needs to recognize that and activate that in them. As men we need to band together to subjugate women and put them back in their place. I know the pain every guy here feels and it bothers me and I only want to help but kindness will get you nothing in this world and you must have no mercy.

  170. Dean Walker says:

    I, for one, wanted sex but never wanted to have children. In order to do a decent job of raising children one must, pretty much, center his/her life around them; so when women started wanting an identity other than housewife, I welcomed it. Other men were still able to get a woman’s affection. So it’s not a matter of subjugation. It’s a matter of not being able to awaken a woman’s desire.

    We don’t know what awakens a woman’s desire. To a large extent it isn’t good looks. And it’s not being a good person; as we all know, many chronic alcoholics and compulsive gamblers have had wives and girlfriends.

    On this blog, we’re the kind for who have trouble getting any woman’s desire. There is Androcur and there might be techniques for arrousing their interest online. You’ll probably get zero replies if you go on sites that promise you sex immediately. If you read the “terms and conditions”, really read it, you’ll find that there are fictitious profiles put there by the management. But not all of those matchmaking sites are like that. When you are ready to try online dating, read the terms and conditions; and really read it.

    What about prostitutes? In Holland one can go to sites similar to “backpage” and place an order for a woman to be sent over, without fear of being arrested. I have read an account of one young man who considered that an easy way to meet his sexual needs, because dating is too much of a hassle.. wine and dine and then maybe, maybe. In USA, because of this big bruhaha about human trafficking, one is likely to be arrested for solicitation. However, some say that you can ditch Backpage and have good luck on a site where there are desperate college students. Chances are you don’t say “How about going to bed” at the beginning of the first date, but things might progress more smoothly once you start dating.

    What about going on tours abroad and meeting a Russian woman? What about going as a tourist to third-world countries and meeting someone?

    If a housewife is what you want, then aren’t there women who want to be housewves and

    What about visiting a woman in prison? In the visiting room, you might want to just sit and play cards with her, order a pizza, and enjoy her company. As time goes on you might be able to kiss and cop a few feels. As for plans to stay together when she gets out, maybe. Make sure that she intends to go straight and not go back to her old ways.

    What about a woman who wants to be just a housewife and raise children? I’m sure that there are some. Or maybe you can be an expatriate in some part of the world where women are expected to stay at home? If prostitutes are cheap and plentiful in the area, then her fear of your being tempted would deter her from pulling crap like being tactically moody.

    I hope that this blog can become one of pragmatic discussion, instead of the complaining and anger and talk about positive thinking and “just get religion” stuff.

  171. Anonymous says:

    The pain that we feel here is warranted but every guy here needs to begin working on himself and become the man he wants to be. Trust me, every guy here has had women look at him with lusty eyes it’s our own fault we haven’t taken advantage of it. I know this for a fact because I’m the anonymous one posting here and everything I’m telling you is true and it’s working and this slump I’m in is ending and my best friend tells me everyday to cheer up because things are improving. Women look at me and wouldn’t believe that it’s been a while since I’ve gotten laid so the best thing to do is fake it til you make it. One thing for sure: don’t hate women and purge the misogyny from your heart.

    I wish every man on this forum the best and if I can help I’d be glad to.

  172. Hugo Beaving says:

    I’ve followed this thing for a while, I’ve got a similar sad reply from a couple years ago on this. I was suicidal, and I got very close to shooting myself. In that lowness I decided I had nothing to lose by working out and dieting. Food had lost most meaning for me anyway so that part was easy. What shocked me was I enjoy bodybuilding.

    Over 3 years I’ve lost 80lbs and put on muscle for the first time ever… also I charged Lasik and getting my front teeth fixed.. it’s paid off in a big way. I’m on females radar for the first time, when I see chicks who haven’t seen me in a long time.. I can watch them re-evaluating me in real time. I’ve got a girlfriend already, yes it is incredible to have someone care about you. So yes gentlemen, women ARE shallow, just like us. I’ll admit I never made any real effort towards my appearance.

    For the few whom getting in shape isn’t a possibility, I’m sorry. But most have room to improve. One thing I can tell you all definitively, chicks DIG muscle.

  173. anonymous says:

    Whatever it is, keep improving yourself and fake it til you make it.

  174. Dean Walker says:

    How do you fake it?

  175. Dean Walker says:

    You said that you fake it until you make it. How do you fake it? You’re not answering me.

  176. anonymous says:

    So basically the best way to fake it is to remember your past success stories with girls. If you don’t have any make it up. Alot of us here don’t notice when a girl buys him a shot or smiles at him or winks at him or don’t know what to do about it. Just straight up attack and do it and if you get rejected on to the next one and the next one and the next one. Another thing, don’t ever catch feelings.

  177. Dean Walker says:

    You mean … fake it by talking about your past success stories, in order to impress people?

  178. anonymous says:

    Forget about impressing others, use your past success stories and have them on repeat in your head to remind your self.

  179. Deansdale says:

    Let me answer that question: there are successful guys out there, learn what it is that women love about them and try doing that thing. At first you will have to fake it because it won’t come naturally, but with some practice it can become a second nature, and you will have more success with women. It’s important to understand though that there are many male types that women love for different reasons, and you should try to imitate the one that suits you best. If you’re a fat bloke who faints at the mere mention of a fistfight you shouldn’t try to act like a macho tough guy, it will inevitably lead to failure – you should choose an other approach, like being funny. There are general guidelines to follow, like having impeccable personal hygiene, getting in shape, buying clothes that fit, etc., but how you actually approach women should be tailored to your personality.

  180. Dave says:

    Well, well I found an article that isn’t about hating ones self for not being successful with women, but instead encourages men to learn a new tact to figure it out.

    I myself have gotten rejected, turned down, and downright humiliated some many times that I’ve stopped counting. I’ve tried many approach but still no success.

    I’ll be turning 31 next week, still a virgin man. I know I’m overweight, health is deteriorating, and I’m not well off. But like you said men worst off than me have succeeded with less. Just not sure if I was meant for happiness. What with dealing with life and society dumping the pain on me my whole life, whether it be kids in school kicking me off the bus so that I bust my teeth in the sidewalk, and the schools doing nothing. Or getting stabbed in the back (literally) by a dude cause he didn’t like that I asked his sister out. Many more issues, some involving women playing their silly mind games, which I stopped falling for quite some time ago.

    I’ll take what you said in this article and see if it has any meaning for me.

    I’d like to get laid at least once before I croak, but who knows maybe fate has a different idea for me.

  181. jt85 says:

    You’re suggesting escorts? Shame on you..

  182. Chris Johnson says:

    Escorts save lives, including my own. If escorts hadn’t gotten me through my 20’s I’d have eaten a bullet. And the girls I met were all nice, just trying to get by in life. So if your some Christian Trump supporting asshat who thinks escorts and escort users are going to hell, then no, shame on YOU.

  183. Deansdale says:

    Mentioning Trump in this context is quite strange considering he fucked tons of models, porn stars and whatnot. I doubt he would be against the idea of escorts.

  184. Chris Johnson says:

    Indeed Trump is fine with escorts privately, Christians who continue to support him don’t. It was a comment on the users own Christian hypocrisy rather than Trump directly.

  185. Dean Walker says:

    How about a practical approach, if you feel that life is continuous torment, because of being unattractive to women?

    Relief is attainable. with a medication called cyproterone acetate, libido does decrease. It is sold under different brand names, like Cyprostat, Androcur, and Siterone. In the USA it’s prohibited by the FDA. Are doctors in other countries willing to prescribe it?

    One man named Revenge, on this blog, talks about having his testicles surgically removed. That would probably not work, because other endochrine glands secrete testosterone in response to signals from the pituitary gland. Cyproterone acetate, taken orally, is obviously, a better way.

  186. Pavlov Pepno says:

    We really don’t know what makes a man attractive to a woman. But there are a few things we do know. One of them is: Self-pity repels people — sexually and socially. Noby who wallows in self-pity will be welcome anywhere. And women are repelled by men who can’t stop thinking about sex.

    And I”m speaking from the experience of having been disinterested in social contacts, unless there was a pretty immediate prospect of sex. Of course there were other half-way forms of satisfaction like dancing (especially close) — end sometimes even just talking with a woman who didn’t seem to feel superior to me. This kind of thing happened even in the “sexual revolution” period before AIDS was any problem, when there wasn’t any infection that one couldn’t get rid of with a little bit of penicillin.

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