We’ve sure talked a lot about domestic violence. And it seems we still have a long way to go ’till we really get somewhere.
Via NSWATM I found an article with a promising title: Domestic Violence Isn’t Just About What Men Do to Women. It starts with a confession by a woman about her own DV problems:
I divorced the father of my four kids after 16 years together, and I was arrested three times: once for assaulting him, once for assaulting his new girlfriend, and the last time for violating the order of protection he’d taken out after the first incident, when I upended a coffee table in his direction on Christmas Eve, two months after we’d separated.
Well, waddaya know, woman actually do commit DV. So far so good. But a few paragraphs later we find the first signs of feminist bullshit:
Experts are now breaking domestic violence into two different categories: intimate terrorism and situational couple violence. Collins explains: “So-called “intimate terrorism,” overwhelmingly perpetrated by men, is embedded in a general pattern of power and control (…)”
Go fuck yourself. Overwhelmingly.
When will we ever get to the point where common sense becomes the norm? People – men and women – are violent because they are angry. “Control” has nothing to do with it, nor “power”, nor any other fucked-up feminist fetishes. For feminists everything is about power and control. They are obsessed with it and they project this obsession onto normal people.
Just like the woman writing the confession in question, everyday people hit others only when their anger reaches a threshold. You should know the scene from cartoons already: a red face with steam coming out of the ears. That is when people lose self-control and they lash out at the source of their frustration. Again: it has nothing to do with power or control.
If my explanation is not good enough for you, here’s an expert’s:
(…) what women and men engage in roughly equally, according to Penn State sociologist Michael Johnson, PhD, is called “situational couple violence.” The author of dozens of papers and a book on domestic violence, Johnson says the situational type doesn’t permeate a couple’s life but bursts out when specific tensions ramp up.
There are two conflicting theories for DV (the real and the feminist one), and someone came up with the bright idea that these should be coopted. Problem is, you can not integrate truth and lies. And we have a rather strange situation now, where common sense is forced to exist hand-in-hand with feminist dogma.
People know that the source of violence is anger. And statistics show that men and women are committing DV at about the same rates. But, but, but! There must be a hidden type of violence overwhelmingly perpetrated by men, with a pattern of power and control! Nobody have seen this, only feminist scholars, but hey, we must believe them because women never lie. And they are not violent. Yeah, yeah.
the cell stank (…) It was packed with women: a whip-smart 16-year-old lesbian named Paradise whom I initially took for a boy, in for assault; two enormous women, lovers, who’d engaged in a domestic brawl—one bandaged above her left eye
Tell me it ain’t so… Lesbians commiting DV? No way!
Sexual abuse by a woman partner has been reported by up to 50% of lesbians
WHAT THE FUCK? And this is coming from the University of Missouri’s National Violence Against Women Prevention Research Center! No patriarchs there, that’s for sure.
(Suddenly the “1 in 4 women raped at college” bullshit starts to make some sense, if you recognize that maybe half of those “victims” have been raped by other women, but I digress.)
Now things are starting to get weird:
Lesbians who abuse another women may do so for reasons similar to those that motivate heterosexual male batterers.
So, there’s this basic feminist dogma that when committing DV women are just “victims” of their own overflowing emotions but men are “terrorists”. But lesbians can be terrorists too, despite having a vagina. So, dear experts, please enlighten me, if a woman can be an emotional terrorist in a lesbian relationship, what stops women from being one in hetero relationships?
I’ll tell you: nothing.
Feminist lies contradicting reality and contradicting themselves. What else is new?
But wait! There’s more:
Many lesbian batterers grew up in violent households and were physically, sexually, or verbally abused and/or witnessed their mothers being abused by fathers or stepfathers.
They have an excuse! They are innocents, no, they are victims! It’s men’s fault! When a lesbian slaps her lover it still is a man’s fault somehow. All abuse must come from men, because, you know, women are never violent.
Let me get this straight: according to this theory, at least 50% of lesbians must come from violent homes. They might as well say that DV causes lesbianism.
The seething hate and the anti-male bias is staggering.
Also, let’s see what the writer of the confession has to say, a paragraph somehow missing from the article at Racialicious:
Between my parents, the anger frequently turned physical. (…) she hit Dad on the head with a beer bottle, and an ambulance took him to Bellevue Hospital for stitches. Emilio remembers Mom throwing pots at Dad and a general sense that when our father visited, he was always late and she was always furious. (…) And as much as I dislike my father (…) he wasn’t the initiator; from what I saw, it was all her.
She is following in her mother’s footsteps. Illuminating. But let’s continue with the article:
Violence appears to be about as common among lesbian couples as among heterosexual couples.
I have yet to see a statistic that half of all hetero relationships have some form of sexual abuse. Lesbians commit more DV than gays or hetero men, that is 100% sure.
In addition, a unique element for lesbians is the homophobic environment that surrounds them.
Let me ensure you, most men in the anglosphere is surrounded by a misandric environment. But the main point is: do we have to always search for excuses for women? Because that is what these people are doing. It’s always the fault of others. Their fathers must have abused them, their environment is hostile, what else can they come up with? And why aren’t these excuses applied to men? Is it impossible that they were abused (by their mothers for example), or that they live in a hostile environment? Why is it that excuses only work for women?
I had some difficulty finding the type of easily shared information [on gay DV] as I found for lesbian violence
I wonder why that is. Could it be that it is swept under the rug because gay men are less violent than lesbians? Nah.
So, it seems that common sense is spreading, but most sources still espouse feminist bullshit. The facts are clear: women are just as violent as men. But hey, don’t let truth stand in the way of some good old feminist male-bashing. Women are just as violent as men, but women have all the excuses while men have all the blame.
What was the title of the article again? “Domestic Violence Isn’t Just About What Men Do to Women”. Half a point for good will, but still not nearly good enough. Maybe a D-.
ps. Want to see some more interesting stuff?
In the 16 years Q. and I were together, I can think of at least five times that I hit him, usually in the face. (If asked, he might come up with a few more.) (…) Q. never hit me back until the Christmas Eve fight, and even then it was really in self-defense; I was going after him like a panther. He was living in a rental down the street from our Brooklyn house, which I’d been granted in the divorce (…)
(…) Steinmetz, drawing on an exhaustive analysis of the 1975 National Family Violence Survey, proclaimed that “the percentage of wives having used physical violence often exceeds that of the husbands, but…wives also exceed husbands in the frequency with which these acts occur.” Steinmetz’s article infuriated academics and laypeople, men and women alike, who thought she was obscuring the bigger problem—male on female violence—when it only had begun to be addressed. Steinmetz was the object of an unsuccessful letter-writing campaign to deny her tenure; she received a bomb threat at her daughter’s wedding (…)