I wrote about this subject some time ago but it seems the old answers just don’t cut it anymore. I stand by everything I have written on game in the past but I have to elaborate more if I want to address all the recent criticisms.
Most of the confusion of game-haters come from the fact that game actually is confusing. It merges two seemingly contradictory worldviews into a single mindset, and many men are stuck at either not understanding one of these worldviews or not understanding how they can be merged.
1. Practice game for the happiness of your GF/wife
Many naysayers will argue that if you have to do something “unnatural” to make your wife happy then it must be considered “fakery” and it makes you a wimp. I have news for these fellows: your behaviour is not “natural” either; it’s all learned.
And hey, if you don’t want to make your woman happy what the mountainclimbing fuck are you doing in a relationship with her? I enjoy when my GF is happy because I’m a decent human being and not a sociopath. And I don’t think it’s shameful. Go figure.
I reckon every guy wants to make his GF happy because we are wired that way. Evolution at its finest… You WILL do things to make her happy, the question is: will these be effective? The “modern methods” do not work, period. 95% of nice guys are using methods which will make their GFs actively UNHAPPY.
Refusing to change your methods when they demonstrably will NOT bring the desired results is, well, there’s no other way to put it: retarded. Imagine someone fishing with roses instead of worms – and when you point out that he’ll never catch fish with roses he answers “he’s a roses type of guy”. And he keeps complaining the fish won’t bite and that it is somehow “not fair”. Isn’t he really, really dumb?
A happy woman means a better relationship, which in turn means a happier you, so any energy spent on improving your methods is actually an investment in your own happiness.
Also, there’s a pesky little problem with the concept that the methods you are using right now to make her happy are the “core of your personality”: it’s false. You have learned these methods too, from your parents, the media, your teachers, feminists, etc. But these do not work, and replacing them with ones that do will not alter “who you are”; it won’t drastically change anything about how you perceive yourself. If you try to write with the wrong end of the pencil, turning it around is not a crime against yourself. Saying “this is who I am, take me or leave me as I am” while sticking to your learned but defective behaviours will only make you a bleeding heart idiot, but won’t accomplish anything. It’s one of the stupidest mistakes you can ever make, because it ensures your own unhappiness.
But hey, don’t let me shatter your brave illusions. If you insist on fishing with roses, who am I to judge you? Good luck and keep up the good work. I was a “roses kind of guy” once, but I opened my eyes and became a hundred times happier for it. I am fishing with worms now, and I have no moral crisis about it.
2. Practice game for yourself
You might not realize it but the feminized zeitgeist puts immense stress on your masculine soul. It’s hard to see it for what it is because it’s everpresent, and thus invisible to the untrained eye. You only really notice how heavy it is when you finally break free from it. And this is where game comes into the picture.
You were taught that you should bow down to women all the time, no matter how bitchy or stupid entitlement princesses they are. This is actually f*cking annoying, because you do it day after day but deep inside you feel humiliated. 95% of nice guys are nice guys because they have accepted the teachings of the feminized culture saying they are less valuable than women. They act nice and they are nice, but it does them no good. On the contrary, it hurts them, but they can not put their finger on exactly what is wrong. They see that being a nice guy does not bring them happiness but they keep on being nice anyway, because they think the only other option is to become “evil”. This makes them a martyr in their own eyes, perpetually fighting a “bad world” which is not fair to them. They don’t know, but there is a third option: becoming a man. A man who spits on feminized bullshit but who can be kind to women on his own terms. Not a supplicating niceguy but a man standing up for himself.
If you learn “proper” game, it will wake you up to this reality. If you are a nice guy, you must learn game to free you from your f*cked-up feminized programming. Game can lift a terrible burden from your soul, so it is in your own best interest to learn game for your own sake. Even if you never again talk to a woman you should learn game because of this.
3. The paradox
There is a paradox in game: you want to make your woman happy, but if you do anything in order to make her happy it will make her unhappy. This is because doing things for her conveys the subconscious message that you’re her servant and this will make her respect you less. So you have to do things to make her happy without doing things to make her happy. Complicated, isn’t it? :)
Luckily I can cut this gordian knot quite easily: let’s suppose you go to the gym. If you tell your GF you train just for her, it will make you look like a wimp. But if you do it because you want to become stronger, it will make you more attractive. Doing the very same thing can have opposite meanings depending on the context.
Anything you do, you have to do it for your own amusement, and this will make her more attracted to you. Never do anything directly to make her happy; it won’t work. If you want to make her happy you have to do it indirectly. Improve yourself and she will like you for it. Apply this concept to every aspect of your relationships and things will suddenly go a lot smoother.
If you understand all this, you can finally read the game manuals and start to improve your relationships.